In Darkness, Divided - TimmyJaybird (2024)

Chapter Text

The day was bright as Sekh walked along the ramparts, the sun warm as he moved along what felt like barren stones. There wasn’t a reason for anyone to be up on this part of the ramparts anymore- not for more than a year- but it still felt eerily empty.

He paused at the large door, reaching for the handle- and finding the Szarr palace still unlocked. Just as they left it.

He pushed the heavy door, let himself in, and listened to the hinges creak as it closed behind him. The entrance foyer was much as he remembered- faded, worn carpet, paintings along the walls that were losing color. There was a distinct smell of dust, neglect, hanging in the air now.

Attempting to be quiet, even though it wasn’t necessary, he headed straight for the open ballroom doors. He hadn’t properly taken in the room before, during his first and only visit. It was large, open , yet the ornate chair at the head of the room looked so uncomfortable .

He curved to the left, headed for the old elevator. It sat, unused, no new scuffs visible. And, thankfully , it still worked when he tried to activate it. He descended slowly, down to the crypts, the smell of dust turning to a warm, wet, not quite decay scent. It wasn’t pleasant, but it was tolerable , at least.

Once the elevator settled, he moved not for the old ritual chamber- but for the small room he remembered finding with Astarion and the party, what felt like a lifetime ago. The room looked frozen in time, as it had been left last. Cold. Lifeless.

A part of his gut told him he shouldn’t be here- that this entire palace should have just been set to fire. But stone didn’t burn- and as much as he knew Astarion would’ve loved to see it aflame, the damage it could have done to the rest of the city would’ve been unimaginable. It had been best to leave it to rot.

And Sekh would have, easily- except watching Astarion delve deeper and deeper into trying to understand his nature, in trying to tame it, use it for his own desires- it made him wonder, what little diamonds of knowledge might be hidden away in these forgotten halls? Who would have had information stashed away if not Cazador himself?

Thinking his name made Sekh grit his teeth. He swallowed down the anger, headed for the small bed in the room, stooping over to grab the old book he’d seen sitting there, upon entrance. He planned to comb through the dead vampire’s study, but had wanted to get this bit of exploration done first.

He sat on the edge of the bed, flipping open the book- caught off guard when he realized it was handwritten, and not just some old, unlabeled tome. He flipped towards the end, saw Astarion’s name scrawled angrily-

Gods below, it was a journal . The gods damned mad men kept a journal . Why is it almost laughable?

Idly he moved through pages, just looking for something to catch his eye- paused when the writing turned suddenly slanted, desperate . Two names, over and over again, in a tumultuous rhythm along the page.

Vellioth.

Astarion.

Over and over - by the end of the page, the names were written into each other, so he couldn’t even tell them apart. Sekh remembered the visions that had been forced into his skull- he’d seen Cazador impaled, Cazador with tear stains on his face- heard a voice he didn’t know.

Astarion hadn’t known who Vellioth was for certain. Possibly the vampire who turned Cazador, yes- but Cazador had never spoken of him. But it seemed his dead sire had never left his mind- as Sekh continued to move along the pages, he’d see the name frequently- sometimes even the same desperate scrawling.

He snapped the book shut, taking a steadying breath. The writings of a madman and nothing more- yet, there was always a chance that something worthwhile could have poked through the madness. He’d have to review it in full-

But not here. Definitely not here.

He stood up, walked over to the desk in the room, opening all of the drawers. There were a few penned yet never sent letters- he took them all, stuffed them into the journal. The books that otherwise littered the room seemed of no importance to his goal- and being in the room sent a cold shiver down his spine. He turned quickly to leave, navigating in the pulsing, low light that seemed to radiate from the open golden doors.

Outside the chamber, he could see the cells, in the next room- and beyond that , where he had nearly lost Astarion to the ritual, in more ways than one.

He didn’t want to see it again. He knew there was nothing waiting there except rotten ghoul bodies. He knew Cazador wasn’t there- Karlach had chopped him to bits , Shadowheart had burned those remains in moonlight- the bastard could never come back. They had made sure of that.

Still, it made him uneasy.

He moved back to the elevator, kicking some dust off it- when he noticed a small indent, barely visible in all of the ornate etchings. He crouched down, trying to examine it closer, ran his fingers along it. The indent was shallow, but didn’t look like a chip. It seemed… purposeful .

Sekh thumbed at his middle finger- twisting the ring he had slipped on before he’d left his home. The Szarr signet ring- the key to this whole wretched place. He had thought it would be a smart idea to have it on him, in case of any locked doors.

Astarion didn’t know he still had it- or if he did, he never once brought it up. Sekh kept it tucked away, so the vampire would never have to see it.

Carefully he pressed it into the indent. When he did there was a small snap , a clang of metal- and one of the etchings opened, revealed a jeweled button, like the one that would cause the elevator to ascend back to the main floor if he pushed it.

Sekh sucked at his tongue, curiosity raging in him. He had no idea what it did , and if it sent him crashing down to his death- well, no one would ever know what happened to him. He hadn’t told Astarion where he was going, when he left. His lover had been distracted by Yenna, the two of them sparring in the living room , and it had been the perfect time to sneak out and not have to answer questions.

He felt dreadfully guilty about that.

Still, the elevator had worked thus far. He stood up, pressed the button with the toe of his boot, and with the grinding of a few gears, the elevator began to descend . Sekh stood stone still, felt the temperature dropping as the ancient lift took him down, and down, and still further down -

Until the air was warmer, again. As it came to a pause, he was inside nothing but a small room, with a single door, before him. It glistened in gold like the doors above- and he recognized the indent where the signet ring belonged.

He stepped off the lift, walked to the bars, ran a hand along one. The weave pulsed, warm, against his hand. He was getting used to the feeling, that not all magic was chilled like his necrotic magic. Rolan was teaching him, slowly.

Sekh peered through the bars, his heart stopping as he caught sight of luminous, pulsing light. Light he recognized, plants he knew-

Gods above, the lift had taken him to the Underdark . There was a damn entrance below the city- had been for heavens knew how long. He pressed closer, gripped the bar, but he couldn’t see anything except the flora, growing wild and free.

He wanted to open the door, to dash out into it- but he knew that would be possibly an even worse idea than returning to the Szarr palace at all. He didn’t even know where this let out, in the depths. His curiosity would have to wait.

He stepped back onto the elevator, hit the original button, and with a relieved sigh, was carried back up to the palace main floor- though it was quite a long ride.

Once he stepped off it, he took himself to Cazador’s study- went through his desk, leaving papers strewn about. It was dull and nothing but high society political sh*t . Nothing of use.

He considered leaving, with just the journal. He could sequester himself away with it, study each page for any hint of information. Being in this place felt like a betrayal, as it was, to Astarion- even if he had the best intentions. He didn’t expect the vampire to be pleased to learn where he’d been.

He left the study, but paused in the foyer, remembering one other item that might be useful. He turned, rushing down the stairs, down to the lower level, towards the door that had once pulsed with death magic.

It was still now- but beyond it, Sekh could see the deteriorating remains of a girl. Flesh and soft bits mostly devoured by rats over the years, she was bones and cloth now- nothing more. He never learned who she was.

He stepped into the room, avoiding her bones, and went for the small table at the far side of the room. Sitting atop it, abandoned from his first discovery of it, was an old leather journal. One that had been quite clinical , when he’d first looked at it.

Dalyria’s work.

He grabbed it, tucked both journals under his arm, and made back for the stairs. He swore he held his breath, until he was back out in the open air, under the sun. He let the door slam behind him, and never once looked back as he hurried along the ramparts.

*

The sun filled sky darkened to a dismal gray by the time Sekh made it back home. The air felt like rain, heavy- chilled, from the harbor. He had to fight down a shiver as he let himself inside.

And just as he stepped in, he heard a crash . Sighing, he closed the door behind him, as he heard Yenna shout wordlessly in what sounded like victory.

He set the two journals on a small table, heading for the commotion in the living room. Yenna was crouched atop Astarion's favorite reading chair, grinning wildly, one of his hand crossbows clutched tightly. The noise, Sekh quickly discovered, was Astarion- now sprawled on the floor, grinning like mad.

Scattered around her were training arrows- the wood shafts, rounded at the end. They couldn’t break skin- but Sekh knew they still hurt to get shot with. They could leave a nasty bruise.

Yenna hopped off the chair when she saw Sekh, pointing at Astarion. “I finally got him !”

“I can see that.” Sekh walked over to the vampire, crouched down, as Astarion gave an overly dramatic groan, flopping an arm over his face and going still. “I think he’s well and dead Yenna.”

She snorted, walking over and gently toeing at Astarion’s leg. “He’s always dead, Sekh. C’mon Astarion!” When he didn’t move Yenna dropped the crossbow, grabbed at the arm limp at his side, and began pulling, gritting her teeth as Astarion truly let himself be dead weight.

She gave a little grunt, and then suddenly he was launching up, so quickly Sekh swore he blurred, for just a moment. He snatched Yenna up, tossed her over his shoulder, held her with one arm as she squirmed. “What do I always tell you, Yenna?”

She huffed, going lax. “If you think they’re dead, hit them again to be safe.”

He chuckled softly, set her down and ruffled her short, messy hair. Astarion had recently chopped near all of it off, at the girl’s request. “That’s my girl.” Sekh stood up, and Astarion stepped closer, leaned in and pecked his lips softly. “Feels like you just beat the rain, my sweet. Where did you get off to today?”

Before Sekh could answer, there was a crash of thunder outside, and the sudden sound of rain, pelting the roof. Seems he truly had just beat the rain by minutes. Yenna gave an excited shout, rushing for the door- she rather liked watching storms, and since they kept the windows boarded tight for Astarion’s safety, the only way to see them was to leave the front door open.

Astarion took Sekh’s hand, gave him a little tug- and the drow followed him back through the house. Yenna had indeed thrown the door open, was leaning out the doorway, the wind blowing raindrops onto her face, into her hair. Sekh stayed a few steps back as Astarion let go of his hand, walked over to Yenna and leaned out over her, glancing up at the overcast sky.

And then, with a smile on his face, he stepped outside.

Sekh watched Astarion tip his head back, close his eyes as the rain quickly wet his curls. He was only alone a moment, before Yenna was out in the rain as well, up against his side. He wrapped an arm around her, and Sekh felt his chest going tight.

Yenna felt like healing, to him- for Astarion . He had never forgotten how uncomfortable the vampire had been around her, at first. How he had been adamant that children had no place, near vampires. How he had loathed his fellow spawn, Leon, for having his daughter while under Cazador’s thrall.

But now… well, Sekh couldn’t think of them as Yenna’s parents - and he knew she didn’t exactly think of them in that way. But they were a family nonetheless, and it felt right .

Sekh glanced at the journals he’d left at the door, swallowed down the bit of guilt he felt over returning to the Szarr palace without telling Astarion. He would tell him- but not in that moment. He didn’t want to ruin it.

Instead he stepped out into the rain as well, joining them both and letting nature wash away his cares, for just a moment.

*

Sekh had Cazador’s journal settled on his work table, was skimming over the pages. It was well past dark now- late enough that even the city was sleeping, the liveliness that came with dark having quieted down. Yenna had long since gone to bed, and Astarion hadn’t returned yet from his nightly prowls- which meant he had probably left the city walls completely, was chasing after some beastie out by Rivington.

Most of the journal felt like the ravings of a madman- Cazador spouting on about whatever spawn had vexed him that day. His writing was… chaotic, to say the least. Thoughts switching with no ties to the last train, sometimes sentences stopping before they even finished.

He flipped another page, pausing as the first sentence jumped out at him.

Astarion wore Vellioth’s earrings tonight .

Sekh curled the fingers of his free hand, an anger boiling in him anytime Cazador so much as wrote Astarion’s name. He had no right. He never had a right to even think it .

I sent him off to the Blushing Mermaid. There’s talk of one of the Portyr children has snuck out to celebrate a birthday among the lower folk. I know the quality of one’s lineage won’t matter for the ritual, and it is a risk- but perhaps he can bring me home one of their wretched cousins, someone who won’t be missed.

I insisted he look the proper part. It has been some time since I saw him bejeweled- I wanted to tear his throat out before he even left.

Sekh paused, inhaled slowly- told himself to stay calm. Cazador was dead already- he couldn’t kill him twice. Even if he wished he could.

Vellioth’s earrings were the perfect touch- trails of rubies that match the boy’s eyes. No one has worn them since him , I’ve kept his things tucked away nicely. I can still smell him- it floods my chambers whenever I open the chest.

I don’t know what possessed me- perhaps seeing the child prettied up for the first time in far too long simply reminded me how much he resembles Vellioth. But the moment I put those earrings in him, I wanted to tear them out. Wanted skin to break, wanted to see the blood trickle down that pretty neck.

Later. Later . I’ll do it later. When he comes home, I’ll tear them out myself, lick the blood from the rubies and then the tears from his face. I don’t think I’ll give him to Godey tonight. Tonight he’ll be mine.

Mine.

Mine.

Sekh pushed the journal away, feeling sick. Cazador’s writing had gotten sloppier as the sentences dragged, as if he was frantically pushing the pen into the page- ink bleeding around some of the words. He wasn’t sure exactly when this happened- Cazador didn’t date anything- but it couldn’t have been that long in the past.

Still digesting the words, Sekh heard the sound of the door opening, above him. Astarion was home from his hunt, it seemed.

Sekh knew exactly what he’d do, over the next several minutes. He’d make his way up to their bedroom, clean off any stray blood so as not to look nightmarish - even if Sekh thought he was anything but. Once he’d tidied up, he’d peek into Yenna’s room, ensure the girl was sleeping-

And then he’d come find Sekh.

Sure enough, minutes later, Sekh heard the hatch to the basem*nt opening, and Astarion climbing down the ladder. He closed the journal, as he heard Astarion’s nearly silent, barefoot steps.

“It’s late,” the vampire said, leaning over his shoulder. He smelled like soap, not a hint of blood on him. “Even for you.”

Sekh tapped his fingers on the journal. “I was absorbed.”

Astarion let both his arms flop over Sekh’s shoulders then, holding onto him loosely. “Do enlighten me on what plant has kept my darling sequestered away in a basem*nt instead of waiting in my bed.”

There was such an affectionate, playful lit to the elf’s voice that Sekh smiled, even though he felt he shouldn’t. He didn’t think he’d be smiling in a moment. He shifted on his stool, and Astarion let go of him, so he could stand up.

“I did something,” he said, and Astarion quirked a brow.

“You’ll have to elaborate , my sweet. You’ve done quite a lot of somethings in a single day.”

Sekh bit his tongue for a moment, before he simply blurted out, “I went back to the Szarr palace.”

And Astarion, freshly fed and now constantly with a bit more healthy color to his face, went pale as a wraith. When he didn’t say a word, Sekh continued.

“You’ve been so… passionate, learning about your vampirism. And with Dalyria’s work too- well… I thought who better to actually have some useful information than…”

“ Cazador .”

Astarion said the name as if it was laced with Wyvern poison. As far as Sekh was concerned, it was.

“...Yes.” Sekh took a deep breath. “I’m sorry I didn’t tell you. I just… I didn’t want you to even think about that place, or him, for longer than you absolutely needed to. I didn’t want you to think you needed to be there.”

Astarion folded his arms. “It would have been my choice to make.”

He was very, very right , Sekh knew. “I shouldn’t have taken that from you.” Sekh glanced back at his desk. “I found a journal, of Cazador’s. He didn’t have anything of use otherwise, but I thought perhaps maybe he’d… I don’t know, have written about any particular findings.”

“And?” The word was short, clipped.

“Just the writings of a madman.” Astarion clicked his tongue, and Sekh could see he was annoyed. He didn’t blame him. “I did get Dalyria’s journal though. We can send that to her.”

“I’m sure she’ll be pleased.”

“I found something else, too.” Sekh wanted to take a step towards Astarion, but wasn’t sure if the vampire would welcome him in his space, agitated as he was. “Below the palace. The elevator, it…” He paused, took another breath, “It goes all the way to the Underdark .”

Astarion’s eyes widened, just a touch. “How?” he whispered, and Sekh turned, rummaged around his table, plucking the Szarr signet ring from its hiding place. He turned around, held it out, watched Astarion’s eyes lock on the ring.

“I found a hidden button- this… this unlocked it.”

“You kept that?” Sekh gave a single nod. Astarion plucked it from his fingers, examined the ring in the low, pulsing light of the workshop, as if it was the first time he had ever seen. Sekh expected him to throw it, wouldn’t be shocked if the man yelled in frustration at him. Were there roles switched, he was sure he would.

To Sekh’s shock, Astarion slipped the ring onto his finger, fidgeted with it.

“You know,” he said, “the bastard would be seething in the Hells right now, if he knew I was wearing this.” He smiled a little. “Rather charming to think I could piss him off, beyond death.”

Sekh relaxed a little. He offered his hand, and Astarion looked at it, took a long moment before he reached out, took it. “I am sorry,” Sekh offered, “I just didn’t want you to be reminded of him. I didn’t want you to think you had to go back to that place.”

“The sentiment is nice,” the vampire offered, rubbing a thumb along Sekh’s knuckles. “I… appreciate that you always try to take care of me, darling. But I’m not so fragile.” Sekh nodded, didn’t argue, and Astarion pulled him a step closer, smile melting into a more teasing look. “And this does not count as the ring you owe me. Don’t think I’ve forgotten.”

Sekh wanted to laugh. Oh, he hadn’t forgotten- it was something he thought about damn near everyday. He had promised Astarion, after all. Even if ornamental jewelry and legalities felt almost trivial, at this point. Sekh felt as if he’d been with Astarion for his whole life.

He planned to be with him for the rest of it.

*

Sekh had offered to keep his findings a secret- to let the palace rot now, as it was. Whatever knowledge Cazador had regarding vampirism, he took it to his grave.

But Astarion, the following day, having slept on the knowledge that Sekh had returned to the palace, of what he’d found , had pushed that he couldn’t just keep an opening to the Underdark a secret.

Which is how Sekh found himself, the following evening, in the Lodge, discussing the matter with Blurg and Omeluum over tea . Well, tea for Sekh and Blurg- Omeluum simply sat back with its long fingers steepled, those pearly yellow eyes looking almost fascinated.

Astarion hadn’t even bothered with the charade of tea, either.

“You’re quite sure?” Blurg asked, as Sekh sipped at the brew. Blurg made the mix himself- he was quite good and bringing tastes from Sekh’s childhood in the Underdark to life on the surface. The delightfully honeyed and spiced candy he made was proof enough of that.

“I am,” Sekh said, settling the cup in his lap, between his hands. Astarion was sitting next to him, pressed so close his thigh was snug to Sekh’s. “I know what I saw. And the ride down was… quite long.”

Blurg hummed, and Omeluum stood up then, its full, lithe height making it tower over the others as they sat. “This is fascinating, Sekh’met. I would never have fathomed the Szarr family would have need of the Underdark- or access to it.”

Sekh fidgetted. He hesitated a moment- but Astarion had told him, before they’d left, that he should share everything he found with Blurg and Omeluum. They were privy to enough of his past now, as it were. “The last member, Cazador,” gods, the name tasted vile, “I found some of his personal writings. I believe he had plans to… expand down into the Underdark, after he completed his… ritual.”

Sekh had spent most of the night and all of this day reading that damned journal. He’d lucked out finding a few mentions of it- but Cazador would always revert to ramblings about the damn rite shortly after even mentioning the Underdark. Whatever he had planned for it, he had never made it even into truly planning, aside of giving himself access .

“I wonder where it lets out,” Blurg pondered, before he set his tea down, standing up, giving a little groan as his knees popped. “Let me get the map, perhaps we can hypothesize based on our current mappings.”

He left for the next room, rummaging around in the scrolls kept behind their main desk. Astarion stood up then, fidgety now, and said something about going to track down Yenna, who they’d brought with them that night. The girl didn’t have much care for the educational part behind the Society- but she did enjoy roaming about it, looking for whatever trouble children looked for.

Astarion left just as Blurg came back, dropping a few scrolls on the table. Sekh set his tea aside and stood, leaning over as Omeluum did as well, Blurg rolling out the maps. He tapped on the few Underdark entry points the Society knew of and used frequently, pointing to their translated positions within the upper land of Faerŭn.

“Perhaps right around… here,” Blurg circled a portion of the Underdark with his finger. It was mostly unmapped- appeared to be more forest-esque. Or as much of a forest as the Underdark got.

Sekh placed a finger on the map, drawing a line to another small section that had been labeled- what had become Dalyria’s home, along with a number of spawn. They’d settled quite a little town for themselves, and Sekh had been sure to have the location recorded. It made it easier to communicate with her- after all, getting post to the Underdark was quite a feat.

There was something almost comical about the irony that she was settled perhaps half a day’s journey from the palace, looming above her.

“If your vampire compatriot is so close, then the entrance must be closer to the edge of this unmarked territory. This could be perfect for our research.”

Before Sekh could speak, Astarion entered the room, Yenna in tow. The girl made a quick line to Omeluum’s side, peeking over the table. She had a fondness for the Mindflayer that Sekh hadn’t anticipated.

And despite the rhetoric around Mindflayers and feelings , Sekh knew it had a warmth for her as well.

“It’s close to Dal,” Sekh said, as Astarion took up a space at his side, glancing at the map, almost curiously. “ Very close .”

“How… ironic .”

“Think of the time saved,” Blurg said, “the journey cut down to a mere trot across the city. This is revolutionary.” Sekh bit at his lip, shot a glance at Astarion. He was asking , silently- because if Astarion wanted the palace boarded up and forgotten, he’d see it done. This discovery was to his benefit, not Astarion’s- and he wouldn’t put him through the discomfort for his own gain.

But Astarion gave a single, small nod. Permission. Approval . And it was all Sekh needed.

“I can take you there tomorrow,” he said, “Show you how the elevator works and get the door open. I don’t believe it will relock- but we can always set up a system where I come check for you in a few days, if you only want to take a quick, exploratory look.”

“Would you not join us?” Omeluum, eyes glued on Sekh. Sekh wasn’t sure when, but the Mindlfayer had lifted Yenna at one point, held the girls at its hip as if she was a toddler and not a large child. “I had expected you to venture down with us. This is quite the opportunity.”

Sekh hadn’t been back to the Underdark since his foray before the Brain, back when he first met Omeluum and Blurg. He would be lying, to himself, to everyone in the room, if he said he didn’t want to go.

“It might be nice to stretch my legs and not worry about the sun,” Astarion interjected. Sekh glanced at him, and Astarion took his hand, laced their fingers together. “Besides… I suppose I should make sure that gaudy palace isn’t about to topple over and crush part of the city.”

Astarion squeezed his hand, and Sekh squeezed it back, his chest swelling. He was proud of Astarion for feeling like he could face the reminder of his past. It was another step to leaving it all behind.

From Omeluum’s hold Yenna announced, “We’re going to the Underdark!”

“Oh, no, no, no ,” Sekh said, “Yenna you’re staying right here, where it’s safe.” The girl frowned, folding her arms.

“I’d be safe! Besides, Astarion has been training me- none of my friends can beat me when we fight. Even when they gang up on me.”

Sekh looked at Astarion, who didn’t seem shocked to hear this. Was Yenna just out getting into fights for fun with the other kids of the city? How had he missed that ?

Astarion smiled. “You know, it would be good for her. Besides, what harm are we really going to come to? You’ll be so lost in your plants we won’t get more than a few hours from the entrance anyway before we have to turn back with all your samples.”

Well… okay, that was a valid point . Sekh sighed, hung his head in defeat, and Yenna grinned, looking like she was ready to take on the world.

*

“You’re going to the Underdark ?”

The evening was quite late, now. Astarion sat in the Elfsong, across from Rolan, as the tiefling eyed him as if he had just sprouted another head.

“What’s so strange about it, darling?” He ran his finger along the glass of wine in front of him, the tavern rowdy around them. It was good to see business going well, for Alan. It had become a bit of a spot , if Astarion was quite honest, for he and Sekh.

“It’s just sudden.” Rolan lifted his glass, finishing off his wine. He stood up then, held his hand for Astarion’s cup. The vampire handed it to him, and Rolan smiled, before he leaned over, pressed a very light, warm kiss to his cheek. The heat seeped into Astarion’s skin, had him smiling as he watched the wizard walk off, to have their cups refilled.

They’d had plans to meet Rolan for a drink that evening anyway, and it seemed the perfect chance to let him know they’d be disappearing for just a bit. And while the tavern typically did not allow children in during the night, Yenna had always been an exception. She and Sekh were across the room, both distracting Lakrissa from her work.

Astarion rested his chin on his palm, watching the way Sekh’s face lit up when he spoke- the way he seemed to orbit around Yenna without even trying . Always seeming to be in perfect proximity to be protective, yet never suffocating. He wasn’t even trying . Astarion was fairly sure the man had no idea he even did it.

He smiled softly, chest going tight. This shouldn’t be- this little life, he had. To be loved, to be safe - it had never been in the cards. But now that he had it, he couldn’t dream of existing even a moment without it.

And it made him question all of the things he’d always assumed he could never have- everything he had always loathed Leon for.

He pushed the thought down. Children felt like something that should be eons away, to even be considered. After all, he and Sekh had so many years ahead of them.

“You’re lost in thought.” Rolan set his wine down and took up his seat again, turning his head to follow Astarion’s stare. He smiled himself, little crinkles forming at the corners of his fiery eyes. “ Ah . I see why.” Instead of picking up the conversation again, they both simply watched Sekh across the room for a moment, the drow completely oblivious to their stares. “We’re quite lucky,” Rolan said, softly, smitten sounding.

Astarion chuckled. “ You’re lucky. You don’t share a bed with him nearly every night.” The wizard’s tail swished playfully , before it disappeared under the table, flicked at Astarion’s leg.

“I know for a fact you are the one that claims the majority of the bed, Astarion . From personal experience .” Astarion grinned over that, fangs on full display. What could he say? After so long in the cramped dormitories, he couldn’t seem to help himself if he wanted to stretch out .

Or that he wanted to be wrapped up by his lovers.

Sekh finally caught them staring, and gave Astarion and Rolan a little wave of his fingers. He said something to Lakrissa, who shooed him off, the tiefling grabbing Yenna by the hand and pulling her towards the stairs- most likely sneaking up to the room. Astarion assumed Alfira must be up there.

Sekh made his way over, leaning himself against Rolan, wrapping his arms around his shoulders. The tiefling perked up at the affection, and Astarion smiled over it. It was endearing, to see the otherwise serious wizard look almost giddy.

Rolan was… an interesting turn, in his life. Again, not one he had ever expected- but one he was rather glad for.

“Astarion tells me you’re going to the Underdark?” Rolan said, reaching for one of Sekh’s hands and toying with his fingers.

Sekh hummed- smiled as Rolan lifted his hand, kissed one of his fingertips, before the tiefling let go and he was straightening up, moving to take a seat between the two. Always wanting contact after seeing his darlings together, Astarion slid his foot over to Sekh beneath the table, rubbed it along his ankle. “It should be a quick trip- just to try and map out where the entrance leads to properly. A few days, maybe.”

Astarion sipped his wine, feeling a touch of hunger rising in his belly. He’d have to be off soon, unless Sekh and Rolan wanted to offer their necks or pretty little wrists to him- which he didn’t think was the best idea, as he wanted Sekh fully alert for tomorrow. “Don’t be too lonely without us,” Astarion teased, before adding, “Unless you want to come along?”

And Rolan didn’t deny him, right away. Intriguing . Astarion hid his little smile behind his wine. “You know, I have never been to the Underdark.”

Sekh perked up then, eyes alight, dancing . “Blurg and Omeluum wouldn’t mind a bit more company. But what about Sorcerous Sundries?”

Rolan waved him off. “Lia keeps everyone in line, and Cal can handle it for a few days. Maybe a bit of time out of the city would do me good.”

“It would certainly offer some security,” Astarion pointed out, “Blurg is no help to us if we run into a bit of… hostility . Although it would be enticing to see Omeluum live up to his… nature.”

Rolan chuckled. “So you only want me as a nice, warm, solid shield?” His eyes locked on Astarion, and the vampire held back a shiver.

“A very, very dashing shield,” Astarion added. Sekh leaned his elbows onto the table, positively beaming now. Astarion was sure it meant something, to him- to get to introduce Rolan to the Underdark. To the world that he still held so much love for, even if he chose to live on the surface.

Astarion was excited to see him in his element.

“Then it’s decided,” the drow said, grinning. “We’ll all go. Together .”

*

It was daylight , when Sekh led his little party along the ramparts, towards the old Szarr palace. Astarion was tucked safely into his shirt, curled up in his little bat form. It was the safest way to travel with him, during daylight- and Blurg had been far too excited to wait for nightfall.

It was a good thing Astarion had made such progress mastering the shape change. Granted, there was still always a chance his clothes wouldn’t make the transformation properly, but well- they could tackle that if it happened.

The door was still unlocked, the entrance foyer still was desolate and ghost like. Once the door was securely shut, Sekh reached into his shirt, pulling Astarion out, the bat twitching his little ears anxiously. He took flight from Sekh’s hands, moved a few feet away, and then in a whirlwind came back to himself-

Astarion, standing in his, albeit fully clothed - glory.

“He really has made progress,” Rolan mused, adjusting the satchel he had on his shoulder. “I half expected him to be naked.”

Yenna made a little displeased face, groaning , and Sekh waved her off, walking over to Astarion and taking one of his hands. “Alright?” he asked, as the vampire’s eyes darted around the all too familiar surroundings.

He swallowed thickly but nodded. Sekh kept his hand tight in his own regardless, leading the party through the palace, to the old elevator. He toed at the button, drawing Astarion’s attention to it.

“Remarkable craftsmanship,” Blurg mused, bending over to get a look at the etchings. “Why, this predates half the city I bet!”

Astarion was quiet over that- Sekh presumed he was unsure how to handle a compliment to something that was ultimately Cazador’s- even if it predated the deceased vampire. Instead he stamped his heel rather forcefully on the button, sending the elevator moving. Blurg stumbled a little, Omeluum reaching out to gently grasp and right him, its large fingers easily curling along his biceps.

There was a way in which Omeluum touched Blurg that always left Sekh… questioning . Questions he kept to himself, to be polite.

The ride down was long, dark - the temperature dropping quite quickly at one point, before it began to rise again- sending a burst of shivers through all but Omeluum, only to be followed by the sudden beading of sweat, along spines.

When the lift finally came to a stop, Astarion was quick to vacate it, moving for the golden barred door. Sekh stayed a step back as Astarion pressed the ring on his middle finger to the door- and with a click , it swung open.

The first step onto Underdark soil was bittersweet, clawing a mix of emotions up Sekh’s throat. How he missed it- yet how he felt the need to be separate from it, and all the turmoil it housed.

Next to him, Yenna was staring, jaw slack, at the towering flora- so much larger than Sekh could grow, in the space of his workshop. She took a step away, leaning towards one- before Omeluum pulled her back, situating her back at Sekh’s side.

“Careful child- that one is quite poisonous.”

“Don’t touch anything without asking,” Sekh said, putting a hand on her shoulder and squeezing. “Okay?” She frowned- but nodded- yet he kept his hand on her shoulder, ensuring they stayed close.

They paused long enough for Blurg to free the map from one of his satchels, opening it and glancing from it to the fungal forest around them. The air was teeming with spores, a mingling of scents that Sekh swore he could pull apart, categorize each one.

The plan had been to get about halfway from the entrance to Dalyria’s post. They’d make camp there, and the following day, Sekh and Astarion would break off to see her. As much as Yenna had pleaded to come, neither thought it wise to bring a child into a vampire den. Not with spawn still so fresh to their new freedom and hunger- no matter how much Dalyria praised their control in her letters.

Besides, their visit was a surprise - Sekh didn’t want Yenna there in case any of it turned sour.

As they walked, Rolan reached his hand up, nails grazing a few of the larger, visible spores. “This isn’t what I expected,” he admitted. Sekh glanced back at him, and he offered his dashing little smile. “I expected it to be… well, dark . It is right in the name.”

“Oh there are plenty of places that are nothing but sheer blackness,” Blurg announced, walking with an almost skip in his step, eager to settle down so he could get his hands on everything around them. Sekh understood all too well- he was itching to really take a look at the flora. “Best avoid those portions though- even with darkvision you’ll see precious little. And not much lives in that sort of darkness.”

At the mention of the Underdark’s shadows, Sekh felt a stirring, in his head. One that was often silent, these days. He paused, reaching up to press a hand to his temple.

Syl had been near silent, once the Netherbrain was dispatched. Sekh hadn’t had much use for her shadows, since then. And- he felt a bit guilty admitting- but he had other company for the first time since their pact. He found he wasn’t reaching out to her, looking for companionship.

“Darling?” Sekh realized he had closed his eyes. He opened them, noticed Astarion had moved away from the group, paused with him, looking at him curiously- concerned .

“Nothing,” Sekh offered, swallowing. “Just… I felt her. I haven’t in so long.” Astarion reached up, pressed his perfectly chilled fingers to Sekh’s temple, and the drow’s eyelids fluttered over the comforting feeling. Sekh turned, nuzzled into his palm, sighing at the relief, as the wriggling excitement faded. “I’m alright.”

Astarion took his hand back, motioning his head towards their group- which were quite a few paces ahead of them by now. “Best catch up then, or we’ll be left to our own devices in the dark.”

*

By the time they finally stopped to set up camp, Astarion was complaining about the walk. It had been a while since they trekked across Faerŭn- he seemed to have forgotten what walking half the day felt like.

Blurg had barely set his things down before he was off, examining a cluster of young zurkhwood saplings. It wasn’t long before Omeluum had joined him.

Sekh took the map for himself, sitting down in the large tent they had pitched- it would be cramped, but they’d all manage within- mapping out what they knew was close by. It was a half day’s journey to Dalyria, with two possible routes. He wondered if he could convince Astarion to take one on the trip to, and a different on the return, so he could catalog both.

“I have to admit, I believe I’m out of my element.” Sekh glanced up, as Rolan leaned into the fairly open tent. He ducked to get within, before he took up a spot on the bedrolls, next to Sekh. “Your darling vampling has your little child under control, no worries.”

Sekh chuckled. “ Our darling vampling.” He shifted a bit closer, and Rolan slid an arm around his waist, fingers digging in pleasantly at the dip. Sekh glanced back at the map, as Rolan’s other hand moved into his vision, tapped on a little scribble that, to anyone that didn’t know Blurg’s writing and symbols , would look-

Well, like nothing.

“What’s this?” he asked, as Sekh shifted a little closer. Rolan smiled- Sekh knew without looking- and tucked him against his chest. Quite a comforting place, if Sekh was honest.

He knew Astarion would agree.

“That is Blurg’s attempt at drawing a large tree .” Rolan scoffed, and Sekh let himself laugh. “I know, I know . He’s no artist. But it’s a Sussur tree. I’d quite like to go see it, if I’m being honest.”

“It doesn’t look that far.”

“No, it’s not.” Sekh leaned against him then, “if I head out soon I’d be back before anyone even wanted to crawl into bed.” Rolan shifted a little, and Sekh raised his head.

“Alone?” Rolan looked- well, alarmed over that prospect. And Sekh understood, that this was all new territory to him- but this would always be Sekh’s once-home. The Underdark didn’t scare him.

“I wouldn’t recommend you come. Sussur trees… they drain the weave right out of you. It’s not so bad with me, and I’ve felt it plenty of times- but you’re just teaming with magic, sweetie.” Sekh leaned up, kissed Rolan’s cheek. “I have a feeling you’d abhor how it makes you feel.”

Rolan furrowed his brow, looked ready to disagree, when from the front of the very open tent they both heard, “ Oh dear , I do believe I’m… interrupting .”

Sekh glanced over at Astarion, at the grin on his face, and beckoned him over with a curl of his fingers. The vampire was quick to duck into the tent, ending up with a knee on the map as he tried to crawl directly into Rolan’s lap. The tiefling chuckled, got his other arm around Astarion’s waist, pulling him back to his chest, as Sekh slipped his hand to Astarion’s chest, splayed it over where his heart would beat.

“This is a fun sight,” Sekh mused, as Rolan placed an overly affectionate, drawn out kiss to Astarion’s neck- far from the scars, from Cazador’s teeth.

Sekh was still the only one who seemed capable of touching him there. Anyone else and Astarion seized up, went tense in every muscle in his very being.

“Sekh wants to go see a tree ,” Rolan said, into Astarion’s skin. “ Alone .”

Astarion quirked a brow, studying the drow, and Sekh fidgeted a bit, looked away. He just didn’t want Rolan to be uncomfortable- and honestly, unless Blurg or Omeluum wanted to trek out to the tree, no one else would be interested .

Besides, if he went alone- with the rest of the group distracted , he thought maybe Astarion and Rolan could have a moment alone. The vampire had been quite touchy on the tiefling, when he met them at the Lodge that morning.

Plus, they hadn’t… well…

Astarion hadn’t pinned Sekh into the bed the previous night, like was so common for them, nearly every night. And it shouldn’t have felt strange- but the vampire hadn’t done more than press a soft kiss to Sekh, since he’d ventured into the palace alone. He assumed Astarion was still a bit upset- and he didn’t blame him .

Sekh pulled away from the two, stood up with the map in hand, carefully rolling it back up. He wouldn’t need it, the direction was fairly straight forward . “I won’t be gone that long.”

Astarion frowned, even as Rolan wrapped both his arms around him then. For a long moment the vampire held Sekh’s stare, before he sighed, reaching up and back to toy with Rolan’s hair. “Rolan, darling , let me up and I’ll make sure he doesn’t get himself eaten by something.”

Sekh opened his mouth to argue- but Astarion was on his feet quickly, holding up a hand to silence any argument he had. And sure, Sekh could have still pushed- he might even win, his stubbornness rivaling Astarion’s own-

But instead he clamped his mouth shut, swallowed any of the words he had.

*

The first hour of the trek was done in complete silence. Sekh hated it . The moment they’d left their little camp, Astarion had gone quiet. He’d been quiet, every moment he was completely alone with Sekh.

The drow pushed aside a large, spongy plant, stepping up onto a large rock. The tree was close- he could see the glow in the distance, the shape . It wasn’t nearly as large as the one by the Myconid colony, so he assumed it was young. “We’re almost there,” he said, glancing back. Astarion was two paces away, and only gave a nod.

Sekh sighed, continuing up the slight incline. The air began to feel cool, and he could feel something fading in him, slowly. The magic in his veins, from his mother’s lineage- and Syl’s shadows, all beginning to still .

Despite being young, despite not having the sheer magnitude of size as the Sussur tree Sekh had last seen, it was still marvelous , towering above him. He paused within its glow, head tipped back, looking up at it. It was blossoming fully, petals from the Sussur blooms littering the ground floor around him. He heard Astarion behind him, pausing still two steps back.

When Sekh glanced back, Astarion was looking at him , and not the tree. Sanguine eyes taking him in, looking as if he was studying him -

For the first time.

Sekh bit at his cheek, wanted to fidget under the stare, those piercing eyes. Instead, he gathered himself for a moment, and finally said, “You’re still upset.”

Astarion sighed, shoulders sagging just a little. He didn’t move to get closer. Sekh had never hated physical space between them this much in the past year as he did in that moment.

“I’m sorry,” he offered, again. He meant it . “I shouldn’t have gone without you. I should have told you. I should have let you decide if you wanted to revisit the palace. I just… I wanted to protect you.”

That was when Astarion moved. He took the few steps to Sekh, got so close Sekh could smell the bergamot on his skin. “I am still upset,” he finally admitted, “but not just at you .” Sekh frowned, and Astarion fidgeted, hands rubbing along his sides, as if he didn’t know what to do with them. “ Yes , you should have told me. You should have let me make the decision- but it’s not like you to…” he paused, licked his lips, “well, it’s not like you to give me anything but freedom . And perhaps it made me realize…”

He sighed, looked away- and Sekh hated that there was shame , in those pretty eyes.

“All you do is protect me, darling. It’s all you’ve done since the moment you met me. You give me everything - your time, your heart, your very blood . And I’d just like to give some of that back.”

Sekh reached for both of Astarion’s hands then, took them in his own, tangled their fingers together. They fit so perfectly, as if once he and Astarion had been a single, breathing stone buried in the depths of the ground- only the be severed yet retaining their perfectly cut corners. “Astarion-”

“And what if I had said no? What if I had declined to ever set foot in that space again, and had asked you to not. You’d have listened- don’t give me that look, I know you would . And look what it would have kept from you.” He nodded towards the tree behind them, bathing them in soft, glowing blues . “Your one passion.”

Sekh moved even closer, whispered, “put your hands on me.” He let go of Astarion’s hands, only for them to find his waist instantly. Sekh reached up between them, held Astarion’s face, eyes softening. “Astarion, I have plenty of passions- not just Underdark plants . Namely, you . If you’d said no, yes , I would have honored that. And if I never found a rather convenient entrance to the Underdark? It wouldn’t matter. It wouldn’t have changed anything.”

His fingers flexed against Astarion’s soft skin, as the vampire’s hands moved from his waist to the small of his back, locking him in.

“I like protecting you. I like caring for you. You’ve deserved to have someone do both your whole life- I’m only sorry I’m a bit late to it. And gods, you give me back so much more when… you…” Sekh felt his breath stopping, Astarion’s eyes boring into him, soft, adoring , looking at Sekh as if the world had melted away around them, completely. It was just the two of them, then. Everything else simply ceased . “When you look at me like that…”

Astarion tugged him in closer, held Sekh flush to him, as Sekh’s arms moved around his neck, held on as the vampire pressed an adoring kiss to his mouth. It was slow, sweet , had Sekh’s mind unraveling at the seams, his nerves unknitting from his body, his bones crumbling . He never knew how Astarion could say more with a kiss than a thousand words- but gods, the man could .

Astarion pulled off his lips, but stayed so close Sekh knew he could feel each breath. “I can’t even say you’re full of surprises,” the vampire murmured, “I’ve come to just expect perfection from you.”

The drow gave a little laugh, ready to challenge Astarion’s concept of perfection , but he wasn’t given the chance. Astarion kissed him again, harder now, and Sekh felt himself melting into him. The hands on his back clutched at him tightly, held him close, as Astarion inclined his head slightly, kissed with a loving fervor that had Sekh’s mind going numb.

When Astarion pulled back, Sekh sucked in a shallow breath, hadn’t even realized he’d forgotten to breathe, and the elf gave him a charming, adoring smile . Then, in a swift motion, scooped him up. Sekh‘s eyes went wide, arms going to Astarion’s neck out of instinct. “What are you doing ?” he asked, the words cracking as he laughed. Astarion didn’t answer, instead simply carried him towards the Sussur tree, laying him out on one of the long branches that had curved near the ground.

He leaned over him then, one hand on the rough bark, the other finding the hem of Sekh’s shirt, slipping beneath it. “You have no idea,” he said, the pupils of his eyes so large , “how handsome you look right now.”

The blue light was bathing them both, making it seem like they glowed with some ethereal weave, pulsing through them. Sekh swore his heart was melting, and he reached up, trailed his fingers over Astarion’s chin, down the center of his throat. He could almost swear he could see himself, reflected in his eyes.

Astarion kissed him again, slow, deep , hand sliding fully up under his shirt, along the scars at his chest, resting over his pounding heart. Sekh sighed against his lips, got his fingers in his hair, nails gently scratching at Astarion’s scalp, making the vampire shiver.

Sekh felt the teasing touch of the tips of Astarion’s fangs, against his lower lip, before the elf was pushing himself up, pulling his shirt off and tossing it away to the ground. He grasped at Sekh’s, pushing it up his body, tossing it away as well once the drow had squirmed out of it.

Sekh arched his back, as Astarion’s hands moved to his pants, undid the lacing as he pressed a kiss to his lower belly. There wasn’t even a breath of thought of stopping him, no regard that they were out in the open, in mostly uncharted territory.

Let the Underdark’s shadows bear witness to them. Let it know .

Astarion guided the fabric down Sekh’s thighs, took the time to undo his boots, strip him completely , savoring each inch of skin as it was exposed, as if he had never seen it before. Once he was fully bared, Astarion grasped one of Sekh’s ankles, turned and pressed a kiss to it, before slowly, lazily making his way up his calf.

Sekh tried not to squirm, breaths coming quicker. When Astarion glanced at him, he had a look in his eyes- this hunger that Sekh had seen, countless times now- but this longing, this unbridled need to dig not just into Sekh’s flesh, but his bones, his very soul .

This love that made Sekh want to sob.

Astarion continued up along his inner thigh, giving a little groan as he neared the juncture. Instead of moving to where Sekh knew the vampire wanted to, he veered off to his hip, then his navel- and then finally, along one of the larger scars at his chest. Sekh gasped, breaths coming quicker now, heart beginning to race.

“I can hear your pulse,” Astarion murmured, his voice deep, pulling not from his chest but his gut , his very core. “It’s heavenly .” A kiss back along his navel, turning into a slow line of them, until his mouth pressed to Sekh’s mound.

Sekh’s pulse spiked. And he knew Astarion heard it, by the pleased noise he made, into his warm skin.

Astarion pressed a kiss to Sekh’s c*nt, against his lips, before lazily dragging his tongue along it. Sekh’s eyelids fluttered, heard tipping back, as Astarion’s tongue worked past his lips, found his cl*t and laved over it, slowly . One of Sekh’s hands dragged along the bark of the tree, fingers searching for purpose, breaths beginning to heave as Astarion dragged him up slowly, agonizingly into an arousal that was palpable.

Just as Sekh swore his vision was sparking, his tongue moved lower, pushed into him. Sekh gave a cry, arching, back lifting off the bark, shoulders digging in. Astarion’s hands roamed along his legs, chilled fingers feeling like heaven, nails a sort of dangerous promise .

The vampire groaned, pressed harder to Sekh’s c*nt, tongue still working into him, making him tremble. Sekh reached down with one hand, got his fingers in Astarion’s hair, held on tightly as his hips rolled- and then jerked completely, when Astarion’s tongue passed back up to his cl*t.

“ Astarion ,” he sighed, heard the vampire panting as he finally lifted his head. Sekh forced himself to lift his own, even though it felt like it weighed more than a greatsword, eyes half opening to peer down at his lover.

He barely had a chance to take him in- lips and chin wet, eyes blown, cheeks with a healthy flush of arousal- before Astarion was pushing up over him, pinning him to the tree and going for his mouth. Sekh bucked up, rubbing against his groin as he pushed his tongue into Astarion’s mouth, tasted himself and felt the man’s rumble of a groan over it.

It was hell, to have Astarion pull back- but Sekh bit back any complaints as the vampire tried to strip of his remaining clothes as quickly as possible. The drow might have even laughed over it, if his blood wasn’t humming so sweetly in his veins, his body aching as if Astarion has been a part of him forcefully cut out. He just needed him back. Desperately .

Once fully stripped, Astarion placed a knee against the tree, giving himself leverage as he pulled Sekh’s hips closer, slid inside him. Sekh tossed his head back, mouth falling open in a sigh , as Astarion’s hands went to his waist, held him so tightly.

His thrusts were deep , Sekh feeling sparks ricocheting around inside his belly. Astarion leaned over him, and Sekh pushed himself up, got an arm around him, fingers digging into his back, as he pressed his mouth to Astarion’s jaw, then his lips. He could feel the thick scars beneath his fingers- sometimes, he swore, warmer than the rest of Astarion’s skin- as his tongue pressed to Astarion’s, as he drank down all of his little whines and groans.

“Gods,” Astarion managed, against his lips, “ f*cking love you .” He thrust deeper, and Sekh shuddered, holding himself up with one hand, his arm beginning to tremble. He felt too hot under his skin, his flesh too tight, unable to contain him .

He wanted to burst.

“Your… body,” Astarion panted, when Sekh leaned back enough to breathe, “your gods damned soul . All of you .” He moved his hands from Sekh’s waist to his thighs, held them open wider, and Sekh fell back, didn’t think he could hold himself up any longer.

The hand that had touched those glorious scars slid over his belly, between his legs, and Sekh pressed his fingers desperately to his cl*t, unable to stand it any longer. Astarion breathed yes , his thrusts harder now, his nails digging into Sekh’s thighs.

Sekh felt his flesh give. He didn’t care .

He whispered Astarion’s name, felt the way the man shuddered over it- and suddenly it was a broken plea, Astarion, Astarion, Astarion - broken little breaths, and the agonizing euphoric bliss of his org*sm finally taking root in his spine, his belly, his very core.

Astarion growled, as Sekh arched his back fully off the tree, f*cked him through the org*sm until Sekh swore he was melting into nothing - until the heavenly feeling turned into the endless sparks of pure delight as Astarion kept hitting that spot inside him, making him see stars- making him swear his org*sm was unending .

He felt the moment Astarion came- the jerk of his hips, the grip of his fingers, the wondrous heat that flooded him. He breathed a broken yes , hips rolling to take over the rhythm, wanting to let Astarion drown in the sensation.

Astarion bowed over him, panting, and Sekh got his arms back around him, lifted himself up enough to kiss him lovingly. Astarion shivered, as Sekh’s fingers danced along his scars, the vampire still deep inside him. Neither moved to sever the connection.

Sekh tipped his head back, just enough that he could see Astarion’s eyes, looking at him as if he was a wonder just discovered. Somehow the vampire seemed to look at him like that quite often .

The drow smiled, leaned back to whisper against Astarion’s lips, “I love you too,” before kissing him slowly, content to wait out the afterglow as long as they could, locked like this.

*

Astarion could hear the commotion of their little camp before they even saw it . It was later than intended- but he had been hard pressed to free Sekh from beneath him- had wanted to lay out in that strange pulsing blue chill for a tenday, if they could.

But eventually his drow had convinced him that they needed to be up and back to camp- and now here he was, with a satchel full of bark and fallen Sussur petals. What Sekh planned to do with them, Astarion didn’t know- and honestly might never. He just knew the drow said the petals were safe enough to not drain magic- they were basically dead once they had shed from the bloom.

It turned out, what was so lively at camp was Yenna trying to instruct Blurg on how exactly he should be cutting the vegetables she was trying to cook. From the bits he caught, she apparently thought they were much too big.

Sekh took the satchel from Astarion, placed a tender kiss to his cheek, and then was off, not to rescue Blurg but to show Omeluum his findings. The mindflayer was watching with what must have been intrigue as his… partner of sorts was berated by a child half his height.

“You were gone a while,” Rolan said, from where he was lounging at the edge of the tent. He had a book in hand. “I’d ask if the tree came to life and tried to eat you alive, but-” he paused, let his eyes rove over Astarion’s face, “I know that look , and I assume whatever… distraction you found was far more exciting.”

Astarion sat down next to him, watching in the distance as Yenna threw her hands up in what appeared to be defeat, and then shouted, “You’re worse than Sekh!”

Both the drow and Omeluum turned their attention to her at that, and Astarion snorted a laugh as Rolan closed his book. “Do we… rescue him?”

“Not possible,” Astarion said, “He’s going to learn how to properly cut a vegetable to Yenna’s standard, or he isn’t surviving this little trip.” Astarion paused, before adding, “And if he’s worse than Sekh, I do believe he is as good as lost.”

Rolan laughed over that. Both of them knew the drow was- well, frankly dismal in the kitchen. Astarion had rather enjoyed watching him have to learn from Yenna , the child he was trying to care for , how to cook something that at least looked edible.

Astairon hadn’t eaten in near 200 years, but he could tell when something would taste utterly vile. There had been a lot of that, in the beginning.

“He can make a toxin that could kill you in ten seconds flat, or a potion that will make you want to be on your back for days , but he can’t cook worth a damn,” Rolan mused, “how did we pick him again?”

Astarion smiled, watching as Sekh finally tried to intervene, looking as if he was comforting Blurg over the chastising he was receiving from a child. “We didn’t,” Astarion finally said, half his mind still beautifully haunted by how Sekh had looked, underneath the Sussur tree. “He picked us .”

*

It was difficult to tell the cycle of day and night in the Underdark, but Astarion swore the plants seemed to dim , as what was the evening drew on. He had to admit- as much as he did enjoy teasing Sekh regarding his love of plants of all things- it was a rather curious sight to see some of the flora even curl up on itself, as if ready to slumber.

Beyond the movements of the party and the plants themselves turning in, it felt utterly desolate. Astarion hadn’t seen another living creature yet- which, while not wholly unexpected, was still a bit of a problem.

The hunger was beginning to twist in his belly. It didn’t hurt, just- just a little writhing want that kept plucking at the corners of his mind. He could ignore it- had ignored it, plenty in the past, for damn near 200 years of never being properly fed- but frankly, the past year had left him…

Spoiled, if he was honest. There were plenty of creatures outside Baldur’s Gate for the taking- he could easily get out to Rivington within the night, feed on a deer, and be back home with hours of night to spare. Not to mention the city was always teeming with someone that deserved a little death- in the literal sense - and Astarion was slowly building a bit of a reputation for taking care of the rather ugly folk who would take advantage of his neighbors.

And of course, there was Sekh, always willing to offer his neck or a wrist. Even if Astarion was satiated, he was willing to offer to give him that spark that only thinking creatures could give.

He thought perhaps once everyone settled in he might take a little walk, see if he could find anything that might ease the hunger a bit. If not, he could survive a night- it had been so long since he’d done that, but he knew he could . He was considering this, staring idly out past the zurkhwood trees that had excited Omeluum so much, when he felt a hand on his back.

Sekh took up the space next to him, nestled against his shoulder. Without much thought Astarion leaned his head against the drow’s, smiled softly. “I know you’re not suddenly taking up an interest in trees ,” Sekh teased, as the hand on his back slid up along his spine, rubbed gently. It made Astarion’s muscles want to liquify, to melt right around his bones.

“Sorry to disappoint pet, but the plant loving is still all you.”

Sekh laughed, such a sweet little sound, as Astarion lifted his head and the drow pressed a kiss to his clothed shoulder. “How ever will I manage.” Astarion’s smile grew, as Sekh’s free arm lifted up, showing off his bare wrist. “It’s getting late and you haven’t fed. Should we get comfortable?”

Astarion’s chest went tight, over the offer. Because of course the drow would have noticed the lack of any real meal options , and was ready to offer before Astarion could even ask.

For a moment, a clawing guilt rose in Astarion’s chest- an anger at himself, again- because Sekh was so willing, so able to take care of him, and if he had even breathed a word of going to the Szarr palace to Astarion-

Well, the elf was fairly sure he might have denied him. He might have let the old fear take hold, and Sekh never would have discovered the entrance to the Underdark, they wouldn’t be here-

Astarion took a single breath, shutting down the racing thoughts. He didn’t want them. He was just as upset with himself over his fear as he was with Sekh for making the decision for him- and if he could forgive the drow so easily, he needed to forgive himself.

That was something that still took quite some practice.

“A tempting offer,” he said, lifting a hand, cradling Sekh’s own, looking down at his wrist. “But you and I have quite a little hike in front of us tomorrow. I can’t have you weak from blood loss.”

Sekh frowned. “You can’t just not feed, Astarion. I’ll be fine.”

Astarion shook his head, even if he was sure Sekh would be fine. The man seemed quite able to let Astarion go a bit too far on his eager nights, and still function perfectly the following day. But still- there were too many unknowns, and they were about to be in a vampire den. Astarion couldn’t fathom the temperaments of the spawn- and even if he trusted Dalyria, she was one vampire against many.

Footsteps on the soft ground broke those thoughts. On Astarion’s other side, Rolan appeared, having shed his robe, the shirt he had worn beneath tantalizingly unlaced part way down his chest. “We’re not discussing the trees, are we?”

Astarion snorted, let go of Sekh’s hand. “Certainly not .” He felt Sekh pull from him, watched him move in front of him, to Rolan, splaying a hand on his chest and leaning into him.

The teifling’s eyes sparked, this subtle awe struck look he always got when Sekh got close to him. Astarion understood all too well. “I’m reminding Astarion that he needs to feed,” Sekh said, “and that he can’t starve himself just because he’s worried he might leave me a little lightheaded .”

Astarion opened his mouth to retort, but before he could Rolan said, very plainly, “Just feed from me.” The vampire looked up at him, and the tiefling shrugged a shoulder. “It’s the logical choice. I’m not about to go traipsing through the Underdark in the morning.”

And- well, he had a point. Only Sekh and Astarion were leaving to find Dalyria come morning. Yenna had wanted to come, but both Sekh and Astarion were firm in that they were not bringing a child to a vampire den. Absolutely not.

And Rolan seemed less interested in going- he’d offered to stay back, just in case Omeluum and Blurg ran into any trouble and needed a little firepower . After all, one never knew in the Underdark.

Astarion licked his lips, the offer making the hunger spike. “If you’re sure,” he said, and Rolan just nodded.

Sekh didn’t argue- there really wasn’t an argument to be had. “I’ll leave you two to it,” he said instead, even though Astarion wished he would stay. Feeding was always so intimate, with the drow present- even if Astarion wasn’t feeding from him.

But Sekh pushed up on his toes, kissed Rolan very softly, before turning to Astarion, pecking his cheek, then whispering in his ear, “Do be gentle with him.”

The vampire smiled, watched as Sekh headed abc towards their little camp. Without a word Astarion took Rolan’s hand, leading him in the opposite direction, towards the thickening cluster of Zurkhwood trees.

Once pressed safely inside, with a little privacy, Astarion gestured to one of the larger trees, with a thick trunk. Rolan settled down on the ground, back against it, and Astarion got into his lap, straddling him.

On instinct, Rolan’s hands found his hips, held Astarion down on him- and oh , that was a delicious feeling, he had to admit. It always was, no matter the circ*mstances.

Astarion trailed his cool fingers along Rolan’s neck, as the tiefling tipped his head, bared the side of his neck. “You’re sure?” Astarion asked, and Rolan gave a single nod. He leaned in then, hands going to Rolan’s shoulders- but instead of biting, pressed a kiss against his pulse point. He trailed them along his neck, could feel Rolan relaxing beneath him as he did so.

Once he felt the wizard was calm enough , he let the tips of his fangs drag over his neck, in warning. When Rolan still didn’t pull away, Astarion bared them fully, sank them into Rolan’s overly heated skin.

The tiefling gasped, hands tightening their hold on Astarion. Astarion didn’t bite as deep as he could- he always tried to keep biting Rolan gentle . He knew there was an enjoyment in it, for Rolan- but not to the level that Sekh felt. And he preferred it when Astarion kept himself contained, slightly.

His blood was so different, from Sekh’s. Not sweet, not as rich- but even warmer , a spiced salty iron that was lovely on its own. Astarion gave a little groan as he pulled his fangs from the wound, the blood trickling in over his tongue. The moment he swallowed he could feel relief building in him, already, the hunger beginning to quiet.

His hands rubbed along Rolan’s shoulders as his tongue pushed gently at the wounds, encouraging the blood flow. Rolan’s hands stayed on his hips, a grounding warmth, as he slowly began to relax, the pain ebbing away into a sweet sort of numbness.

Astarion was careful to only take a little- enough to silence the hunger in his belly, to lift the fog of haziness that had begun to descend upon his mind. Then he lifted his head, taking in shallow, little breaths, as he studied Rolan’s face.

No sign of discomfort- just a bit of a tired but placated look. Astarion smiled over it, licked his lips to wipe away any stray blood, and pressed a kiss to his jaw, then his cheek, then his temple.

He would have kissed his mouth, slowly , spent a bit of time falling into a calming intimacy- but he knew Rolan didn’t care for the taste of blood. He would never deny Astarion a kiss, but it didn’t… do things for him, like it did Sekh. Rolan wouldn’t turn eager over it, lick the blood from Astarion’s fangs, whisper to him to take another drink so he could taste it on his lips.

It was an aching reminder that Astarion still felt Sekh would have been the ideal spawn . And it made him consider that, while the gods had ignored his pleas for help for damn near two hundred years- maybe they had still done something, for him, in the end.

After all, Cazador never did get to expand his reach into the Underdark. He never found a young Sekh, with no one, who might have clung to the promise of a family. He simply never found him until there was no way he could sink his ugly claws into the drow .

“Was that enough?” Rolan asked, as one of Astarion’s hands moved to his throat, finger swiping up a bit of stray blood. The wounds had already stopped bleeding.

Astarion licked it from his finger, offering a nod. “Enough to keep me sharp , darling.” He flashed those fangs, and Rolan chuckled, hands rubbing up along his sides. The touch was soft, it simply left Astarion feeling warm .

Were it Sekh beneath him, he knew this would have ended differently- he would have taken more, because the drow always encouraged it - he would have kissed Sekh up through the numb feeling, would have ended up rutting around in the dirt like desperate youths.

Hells, he was even sure if Sekh was in Rolan’s lap, the touches would have turned far more tempting and toying-

But, while Astarion loved to indulge in the tiefling, while he had this warm fondness for him- they still didn’t extend the intimacy much between them without Sekh present. Oh, it happened , yes- but far less frequently. Astarion found a comfort in his partner being present with him, and he knew Rolan did too. The vampire didn’t think he ever would have given the wizard the time of day, if not for Sekh.

He was something that bound them, was allowing their own strings to slowly tighten around each other at a slow, comforting pace.

Still, Astarion placed another gentle kiss to Rolan’s temple, and when Rolan’s arms encircled him fully, he was content to stay like this, for a few moments longer.

*

Sekh stirred from his trance, feeling bits of warmth all around him. With a contented sigh he opened his eyes, staring up at the tent above him. All around he could hear soft breathing, still.

Sprawled over his chest completely, only her legs tangled off in the blankets, Yenna was sound asleep. The last Sekh recalled she had been curled up in one of his arms, a barrier between he and Blurg- because she had insisted she be near the Hobgoblin- and it was quite comical to him that she had managed to sprawl herself out to take up more space than possibly any of them - even though she was the smallest.

Next to him, Astarion was facing away, his ass nestled right into Sekh’s hip, the rest of him pressed tightly against Rolan’s chest- where he had insisted on being. Wanting to keep all of the tiefling’s heat for himself- which wasn’t unusual.

Sekh carefully maneuvered Yenna off him, back into her spot. She barely stirred, having the ability to sleep through anything . Sekh sat up, glanced over at Blurg, who was still sound asleep as well, and found Omeluum on its back, hands folded over its belly, simply looking up at the tent as Sekh had been, a moment before.

Sekh gave a little wave as the mindflayer turned its eyes to him, before the drow pointed out of the tent, towards where they had left many of their supplies. He got up slowly, being as quiet as possible as he left the tent, settling down on the rather soft ground and waiting as the mindflayer made its way over to him.

“Did you take a look at the sussur bark and petals I brought back yesterday?” Sekh asked, opening the satchel and offering it with its contents to Omeluum. The mindflayer took it, pulling out a large hunk of bark and examining it in the soft, pulsing light.

“Remarkable- how large was the tree again?”

Sekh considered the tree- which he had taken the time to examine once he aad Astarion had… redressed. “Maybe thirty feet?”

Omeluum hummed. “Still young, but a good size to start. I would like to see it myself to try and discern its age.” It set the bark down, plucking out one of the petals, gently stroking it with its fingertip. “Perhaps I shall venture out to it once Blurg has roused.”

Sekh was describing the route he and Astarion had taken- as the map didn’t provide many details- when the vampire came walking slowly from the party’s shared tent. He yawned as he approached, giving a single half wave to Omeluum and dropping down onto the ground next to Sekh, leaning his head onto his shoulder.

Sekh smiled, reached over and rubbed his thigh. “Good morning Starshine. You sleep alright?”

Astarion closed his eyes, huffing. “I miss our bed,” he mumbled, and Sekh swallowed his laugh, looking over at Omeluum. It was watching them with intrigue, yellow eyes feeling as if they were cataloging the two.

Sekh swore it looked as if it wanted to ask them something. However, he didn’t press. If Omeluum had a question, it would ask in its own time. Instead, Sekh began asking about the zurkhwood, and if Omeluum planned to bring any back to the surface. His samples had been left with the Myconid colony over a year ago, and finding the growing saplings gave the mindflayer a chance to pick his research back up.

“Perhaps,” it said, as Astarion finally shifted, sliding behind Sekh, reaching for his free hair. Without a word he began finger combing it, taming it from Sekh’s slumber. “I would like to transplant a whole specimen if possible. I feel it may have a better chance at thriving on the surface if it has already begun to mature.”

“I’m not carrying a whole tree… giant mushroom… whatever it is,” Astarion said, his fingers working Sekh’s hair now into a loose braid at the back of his neck.

Omeluum looked bemused . “I would never expect such an act. Even with your newly familiar vampire strength, I feel that would be quite a feat.”

Astarion tied off Sekh’s hair, saying nothing more to that. And for a moment, the drow wondered if Omeluum was playing at Astarion’s ego- claiming he couldn’t do something was a sure fire way to ensure he tried.

As interesting as it would be to see if the fungal tree could grow above the Underdark, Sekh didn’t exactly want to be partially in charge of moving the damn things.

*

Sekh and Astarion left once everyone had woken. Yenna had pleaded one last time to come along- and when the answer had been a firm no , she had sulked off into the flora with one of Astarion’s hand crossbows.

The journey was rather uneventful- aside from a few stops when Sekh would get utterly enamored with some plant growth. Astarion had given him grace to a point- but there was only so long he could stand around while his lover cooed at a plant and tried to frantically take notes in his scribbled handwriting.

It was later than anticipated, by the time they could see a structure in the distance. It was large, made of old polished onyx stone. Some of it seemed fairly damaged, but the majority of what Astarion could make out as they neared seemed intact.

“What is this?” he asked softly, realizing it was massive .

“I think an old war stronghold,” Sekh said, “ old drow . Much older than me.”

Astarion glanced back at him, a snide little smile creeping onto his face. “That’s not a difficult feat. You’re not very old at all, my love.”

Sekh waved him off, as if he knew what he meant. And while Astarion did - it was rather fun to tease the drow. Especially as Astarion swore he had nearly fallen over when he discovered Sekh hadn’t even seen a century yet. He had so much life to live, still.

Astarion was prepared to tease him further when he caught a flash of movement, in the corner of his eye. He paused, held his arm out to pause Sekh, trying to focus on where the movement had gone. It had almost been nothing-

But then a single footstep, and Astarion was moving, turning and drawing a dagger, taking three running steps and pressing it tight to the throat of a figure that had been a millisecond away from lunging at them.

Astarion bared his fangs, the fingers of his free hand curling, showing off his dreadful claws. “You have a breath to convince me not to slit your throat.”

Behind him, Astarion felt a change in the air- a heat, a certain warm smell that came whenever Sekh invoked Syl’s shadows. He had never noticed it during their travels- but once the tadpole was dead, all of these little details that had previously eluded him seemed to come into focus.

The man- a half elf, Astarion was fairly sure- bared his own fangs. One of the countless spawn Astarion had freed.

“We’re here for Dalyria,” Sekh said, stepping up to Astarion’s side. The subtle burning smell was gone, and when he reached his hand to Astarion’s wrist to guide his hand from the other vampire’s throat, there were no shadows snaking along his fingers. Astarion let the drow guide his hand away, as the spawn looked at them curiously- but not yet relaxed.

“You,” he said, squinting at Astarion. “You were the one who killed Cazador.”

Astarion couldn’t wait for the day that he stopped hearing that name.

“Yes, and you’re quite welcome for that. Now, as my sweet said- we’re here for Dal. Where is my darling sister?”

*

The spawn led them inside the structure. The main entrance was quite worn down- but after a short hallway the walls looked to be far more intact .

They ascended a staircase, passed a few other spawn- who all paused to watch them walk by. Astarion didn’t recognize them either- he didn’t think any of these had been his little gifts to Cazador.

The vampire leading them paused at a large wooden door, wrapping his knuckles against it before calling quite loudly, “Dalyria!” There was muffled commotion, before the door was pulled open-

And Astarion felt this cramping warmth, in his belly, at seeing her for the first time. Dalyria . Hair in a messy bun atop her head, fingers holding the door open smudged from writing notes.

Her eyes caught Astarion within a second. “ Astarion ?”

He smiled, giving her a little half bow. “It’s been too long, Dal.”

She stepped past the door, right past the spawn- and her arms were around him, pulling him tight to her. Astarion stumbled for a moment, felt her fingers gripping at the back of his shirt.

He wrapped his own around her, returned the hug, whispered into her hair, “it’s good to see you.”

She stayed as she was a moment, before stepping back, grasping Astarion by his biceps and taking him in. “Look at you,” she mused, and Astarion wondered what she was seeing. What memories she was comparing him to. Was it the first time she saw him, dolled up like a fey dream, ready to lure in the first unsuspecting soul that glanced his way-

Or how he had appeared, when he crawled out of that tomb after a year. Starved, broken, dead down to his soul?

She let go of him, waved the other spawn off, then motioned for her and Sekh to follow her through the open door. They did, Sekh closing it behind them, as Dalyria moved towards a large table, across the room.

Dalyria had, it seemed, set up a little lab for herself. Astarion was anything but surprised. He presumed that plenty of her research on their shared affliction involved experiments- she had whispered about the things she would like to test, back during their servitude. It was good to see her making a reality of it.

“What are you doing here?” she leaned back against the table, folding her arms. “I only just got your last letter a few days ago. You didn’t say you were visiting .”

“It was a bit of an… unexpected trip,” Astarion admitted, as Sekh moved up to his side. “Sekh made a little… discovery .” Astarion glanced at him, gave him a little nod- and Sekh recanted finding the secret key slot in the elevator, that it took the lift all the day down to the Underdark.

That entrance to the Szarr palace was only about a day’s travel away.

“I wish I was surprised that the bastard wanted to get his claws down here,” Dal said, hopping up onto the table. “He did seem to think he could conquer anything he touched.”

“Look how far that got him,” Sekh muttered, before he reached into the satchel he had brought, rummaging around. He pulled out a well worn leather journal, walking over to Dalyria and holding it out. “This is yours I believe- I found it in the palace. I thought you might… still want it.”

Dalyria took it, carefully opening the journal, flipping through a few pages. Astarion watched her face soften, before she closed it and set it aside, reaching out to cup Sekh’s cheek in her cool hand.

“Thank you.” Astarion could see Sekh smiling, and found he was smiling as well.

*

Astarion learned that Dalyria had just over a hundred spawn taking up residence in the old drow fort and the subsequent buildings that flanked it. The building was more than large enough, and most of them came and went as they pleased.

He also learned that many, many of the spawn hadn’t survived. Because none of them had known that they could have reached the Underdark without ever setting foot outside the palace, it had taken them days to get to the closest tunnels to the Underdark. Some had simply run off and disappeared- many had gone mad and thrown themselves into the daylight-

And some had turned on each other.

Astarion wasn’t shocked - but he still felt a sadness, over it- guilt . He knew he was the reason so many of them were trapped with this fate- even if he hadn’t had a choice in the manner. He’d still been the instrument.

They were sitting together, in a room that was a mess of old, well worn couches and half filled bookshelves. There wasn’t much order to the keep- but it seemed to be all they needed. Dalyria had a lab- the spawn had somewhere to call home. It was enough.

Astarion dug the tip of his dagger into the cork of a wine bottle, twisting it and popping it off. He poured into two mismatched glasses, passing one to Dalyria, who sat opposite him.

“I can’t even pretend to be surprised that you brought wine,” she said, taking a sip and then sighing . “ Gods it’s been too long.”

“It wasn’t my idea,” Astarion admitted, “Sekh thought it might be… nice , to bring you a little home comfort.”

Dal hummed, then lifted her glass. “To that darling man of yours.” Astarion raised his own glass in silent toast, before he took a sip himself. It was one of the many blushes they kept on hand at home- Sekh’s favorite. Astarion had grown quite fond of them. Dalyria smiled in approval over the taste.

“The others,” Astarion said, knowing he couldn’t simply avoid the subject. Of his kin, Dalyria was the only one here . And she hadn’t spoken of the others much, in her letters.

The other vampire glanced away, letting one of her legs dangle over the other. “Violet is dead,” she offered. Her voice was laced with the faintest sadness. “Leon killed her before we even reached the Underdark.”

Astarion frowned. “ Leon killed her?”

A nod. “Leon gathered up his daughter and… well, Violet had always threatened that she wanted to take a bite out of the child. I always hoped she had been joking but…” She bit her lip, sighed. “I couldn’t blame Leon for what he did, protecting his daughter- but I can blame him for ripping her body to pieces and leaving it out for the sun. There was nothing to mourn, come daylight.”

Astarion drummed his fingers against his thigh. “Where is Leon now?”

Dal shrugged. “I haven’t the faintest idea, honestly. He didn’t come with us to the Underdark. After Violet attacked and he killed her, he took his daughter and left. I haven’t heard from him since- nor have any of the others.” She took another sip of her wine. “Petras is about four days northwest of here- there was a town that was in partial ruin. Took a bit of work, but he has about half as many spawn as I do there, and they’ve been managing.”

Astarion clicked his tongue. Of course Petras would still be fine. He was just glad he wasn’t here. While he did want to know the fates of his kin- Dalyria was the only one he wished to reconnect with.

“I haven’t kept in touch with Yousen, so I’m not sure how far he traveled. And Aurelia… she disappeared on our first night here. Petras suspected she simply wandered off and got herself killed, but I think she turned back. I think she’s topside, just like Leon is.”

She got up then, walking over to the couch Astarion sat upon, taking up the space next to him. She drained the last of her wine, held the glass out- and he refilled it.

“You know,” she offered, studying the liquid. “This reminds me of some of our early years with…” she paused, frowned, “gods, do you have trouble saying his name?”

Astarion paused for only a moment. “Yes.”

A nod. “Well, our early years . You were young, I was younger , and you told me to drink myself into a trance so I could forget that any of this was real. My mouth tasted like rat blood and the lips of a faceless woman I couldn’t name, whom I had condemned to death… I thought.” She lifted the wine, but paused before the glass could reach her lips. “I never expected to have a single good night again. I never expected to live again.”

Astarion set his glass aside, offering his hand. Dalyria took it, squeezing his fingers. “Are you living, Dalyria?”

She didn’t hesitate. “Yes. For the first time in countless years, I believe I am.” She glanced down at his hand, and Astarion realized her eyes were locked on the Szarr signet ring, that he was wearing. The gates back to the elevator hadn’t relocked, but he had feared leaving it behind.

And he still took some satisfaction in believing that Cazador was rotting in the hells, furious , that he had taken his empire.

“And you, Astarion? Are you living.” Dalyria rubbed her thumb over the ring. “No, not even that. Are you happy ?”

The moment she asked, Sekh’s face flashed in his mind- his smile that made his eyes sparkle like the stars themselves. Countless moments of waking up in bed with him, wrapped in his arms- waking and feeling safe , never once wondering how the fates could possibly turn against him on a new day.

His heart swelled to the point of pain as he said, “Yes. Dreadfully so .”

*

Sekh ran his hand along the old stone wall, feeling all the little divots where it had been mortared together. Whatever room this had once been, it had been grand - high ceilings, a massive set of double doors that required more strength than a single mortal possessed-

When the spawn had shown him to it, they had opened it with ease . It seemed that they were growing in nicely to their supernatural strength.

He paused, moving his eyes up, staring at the large slab of stone that had been engraved- it was a family crest, that much he was certain. It was nothing but curves and lines, to Sekh. He had never paid much attention to his studies when it came to drow nobility and houses- hells, he couldn’t even remember the house his parents served.

He took a few steps back, studying it. The carvings had been painted with a violent red- and while some of it had chipped away, it was mostly intact. He imagined the room once acted as a meeting hall- he could even see where they may have settled- well, not a throne perhaps, but maybe considering how haughty he found noble drow- where the matriarch or high patron could sit, overseeing. Ever watching.

Sekh felt a hand, brush against his shoulder, and jumped, turning around quickly, a hand reaching for his hip- his short sword. He hadn’t heard a single footstep, a single breath.

A man stood behind him, red eyes wide at Sekh’s own shock, his hand now hovering in the air. He was- or had been- human, his long white hair brushed and styled back, to keep off his face.

“I didn’t mean to frighten you,” he said, as Sekh relaxed, thinking something about this man was familiar . He hadn’t met many of the spawn, had only seen a few in the very beginning, before Cazador-

His mind slammed into recognition then. This man had looked so different- hair a bit shorter, blood and dirt matted into it, looking ghostly from never feeding . Barely a husk, truly.

Astarion had said his name.

“Sebastian,” Sekh whispered, and the man’s eyes lit up .

“It is you. You helped kill Cazador.” Before Sekh could say another word, Sebastian moved, reached for him and pulled him against his chest, wrapping him in a desperately tight hug. Sekh was limp for a moment, shocked , before he carefully reached his hands up, resting them along the vampire’s back. “You kept your word,” the vampire whispered, “you really killed him.”

“It wasn’t me,” Sekh said, as Sebastian pulled back, the drow’s hands falling to his sides. “I didn’t kill him, or set you all free. That was Astarion .”

Sebastian’s eyes flashed a tumult of emotions, then. Anger, sadness, and a childlike awe that Sekh knew well. That giddy feeling of just thinking of the man, when he had given you even a moment of attention.

“You were still there,” Sebastian concluded, “so… thank you . Thank you for setting me free.” Sekh only nodded, still not wanting to take credit- in the end, it had been Astarion, even if he, Karlach, and Shadowheart had helped.

Sebastian gestured to an old, lone bench further down the wall. Sekh followed him to it, the two sitting down, Sebastian knitting his hands together in his lap. Sekh noticed his nails seemed long- not as long as Astarion’s, but sharp none-the-less.

Sekh still didn’t understand how Astarion had never once hurt him, with his vampiric claws. He’d stopped asking- it just seemed that Astarion couldn’t harm Sekh without purpose. It was as if he had willed himself into docility for the drow.

“I’m glad to see you made it,” Sekh offered, “glad to see any of you did.”

“For a time I didn’t believe I would,” Sebastian admitted, “it was chaos, at first. So many of us free, terrified and enraged and starving . I was one of the lucky ones, in the end. Even more so that I managed to stay with Dalyria. She’s good to us.”

Sekh smiled- he wouldn’t expect less. Astarion had a fondness for her, and that meant the drow kept her in rather high esteem himself. “How long have you been here?”

Sebastian pondered a moment. “I believe eight or nine months,” he said, “it’s a bit hazy. We all wondered a bit down here, nomadic . And while that might have been fine for a few stray vampires, we were just too many. Finding this was a gods send.” Sebastian paused, glancing away from Sekh. “If you’re here… that means he’s here as well.”

It wasn’t a question. Still, Sekh answered, “Yes… Astarion is here.” Sebastian exhaled, nervously twitching his fingers, and Sekh added- “Look, I can’t speak for him, but… I know Astarion is sorry. He carries a lot of guilt, for what he did while under Cazador’s thrall. And that may not mean anything, especially coming from me -”

“It means something,” Sebastian offered. “I spent so long in that cell hating him. But there was so much more . I hated and then I thought perhaps he’d save me, as if I had been anything more than a wandering fancy…and then I stopped feeling all together.” Sekh reached over, very gently covered one of Sebastian’s hands with his own, stilling his fingers. Sebastian glanced at him. “He truly had no choice, did he?”

Sekh shook his head. “No, he never did have a choice. I don’t believe he chose anything in his life until the day I met him- at least not for a long, long time.”

Sebastian only nodded, carefully freeing his hand from Sekh’s- only to take the drow’s, flip it over, raise it so he could easily examine the creases in his skin, the veins at his wrist. Sekh wondered if he could hear his pulse, like Astarion could. DId that come with time? Or was Astarion simply so in tune with him that he could know such things?

“I’ve still never tried thinking blood,” Sebastian mused, “many of us haven’t. We’ve kept ourselves isolated- Dalyria says it is for our safety. I believe her, we all do- and she ensures our hunger is always satiated, but…”

Sekh sucked at his tongue. “You’re still curious.” Sebastian nodded. “From what Astarion has told me, it… clears his mind. It satiates his hunger much quicker . Sometimes even just a drop pushes him over the line from contented to satiated.”

Sebastian lifted his other hand, traced one of the veins along Sekh’s wrist. “You let him feed- I can see the scars on your neck. You’re littered with them.” Sebastian’s eyes lifted to Sekh’s. “You care about him.”

Again, not a question. Sekh only nodded.

Sebastian hummed, very carefully letting go of Sekh’s hand. “I wasn’t sure- many of us weren’t sure, if there could be a… happily ever after , for any of us. We didn’t think there could be affection, outside of each other.” Sebastian reached for Sekh’s neck then, fingers tracing along little scars. Sekh held still, didn’t flinch away. “But if Astarion can find happiness, perhaps we all can, someday.”

Sekh smiled then. “I think you can, if you just look.”

*

Sebastian left before Astarion and Dalyria came for Sekh. He’d been happy to join them, answer Dalyria’s questions on if he recognized the family crest, if he knew anything about the structure that they had made their home.

He hated that he didn’t.

He learned that the spawn had been sustaining themselves on creature blood- namely, Bulettes . Astarion seemed to shudder at that, but Dalyria had assured him it was actually quite good - she found it more robust and hearty than other blood. Plus, it gave them the rest of the bodies to trade with .

“There’s a city west of here,” she offered late into the evening, sitting in her personal bedroom with Astarion and Sekh. The bedrooms were all rather small, but cozy , all things considered. “Some of the spawn have progressed far quicker than others- so those with the best… control make the journey. The butchers are often quite happy to unload any blood they drain from their meat anyway. We end up evening out when it comes to feeding, which is all we need.”

Sekh elbowed Astarion, as the vampire opened another bottle of wine. Sekh had brought a few as a gift, but now he was considering that he should have brought more . “I told you we could do that, have some on hand so you don’t have to go all the way to Rivington most nights.”

Astarion waved him off. “It would be stale .”

Dalyria laughed at that. “Oh you are spoiled , brother. It keeps quite well if consumed within a few days. Heat it up if you’re concerned about the taste- you can even make it hot . Hotter than it would be, from a dying creature. It’s… nice.” She sipped her wine. “Although, it’s quite apparent that you would never need a reserve.”

Sekh reached up, rubbed at his neck idly. He’d caught many of the spawn eyeing him, taking in the little scars on his neck, which to most weren’t overly noticeable, considering the tone of his skin and the freckles that dotted it. But their eyesight was better.

Sekh wasn’t exactly sure what caused him to speak next, to ask, but his mouth seemed to be moving ahead of his mind. “Do you want a taste?”

Dalyria looked slightly shocked, and Astarion whipped his head quickly to look at Sekh. The drow flushed, mumbled an apology, that he didn’t mean to cross a line -

“Don’t apologize,” Dalyria said, “ please . That is very… sweet of you. And I can’t lie… it is tempting. Astarion has written of how you taste.”

Sekh felt his cheeks burning then- and oh , he was sure she only meant his blood - but blood was such a different thing for the spawn, that he could imagine Astarion’s raving on it feeling sexually charged, intimate .

Dalyria set her wine glass aside, moving her eyes to Astarion. “If he’s willing, I’d like to take a bite .”

Astarion tutted, before giving a sigh. “It’s his choice.”

“Not if it makes you uncomfortable,” Sekh said, but Astarion was already placing a hand between his shoulder blades, gently pushing him. Sekh stood, walked over to Dalyria’s bed, where she sat, and sat down next to him.

“Not his neck,” Astarion said, as soon as Dalyria reached for Sekh. They both glanced at him, and he cleared his throat. “It always just feels very… intimate there. I’m not interested in sharing that .”

Dal nodded, instead taking one of Sekh’s hands, lifting to bare his wrist. Her fangs, when bared, looked to be about the length of Astarion’s- and the sting that followed when they buried into Sekh’s wrist was so familiar .

Except he was used to Astarion’s lips first, to a tenderness that always dulled the initial pain. Still, it was a sensation he was quite used to.

Dalyria’s eyes went wide, at the first taste. She pulled her fangs free, lips pressed tight to Sekh’s skin, as she swallowed. As she did Astarion got up from his seat, walking over standing between Sekh’s knees, stroking his hair softly.

Sekh would have let her go longer- but Dalyria pulled off after a second swallow. Her eyes were bright , blood clinging to her lips, her teeth. “Gods,” she murmured, glancing up at Astarion. “You did not do him justice, brother.”

Astarion smiled, took Sekh’s hand from her grasp and lifted it, kissed the wounds. He held Sekh’s stare the entire time. “He’s decedent ,” Astarion whispered, licking the blood from his own lips. “And far more than I deserve.”

Oh, Sekh didn’t agree with that. He thought Astarion deserved the world- all the realms, even those of the gods. He deserved simply everything .

Dalyria licked her own lips, ran her tongue along her teeth, her fangs. “Could I keep some of your blood?” she asked, quickly adding, “I’ve been researching not only a possible cure to this… affliction, but also if there is a way to mimic the nutrition we get from blood. And gods, if I could mimic yours …”

She trailed off, even as Sekh nodded quickly. The sheer idea of eliminating the need for blood- it would be life changing, he knew.

Dalyria got off the bed quickly, moving to her desk, rummaging around. Sekh could tell that plenty of her lab spilled into her bedroom- and he respected it. Far more of his would if Astarion wasn’t constantly reminding him that he wasn’t interested in sleeping in a fungal forest .

Sekh flexed his arm, as she placed a very small jar under the wounds. He watched as his blood dripped slowly, coating the bottom. She took very little, but assured him it was enough . Besides- knowing she could reach Baldur’s Gate within only a day’s journey meant he was close by, should she ever need more.

She capped the jar quickly, set it on her desk- was going to wrap Sekh’s wrist when he stopped her. “I heard some of the spawn have never tasted thinking blood,” he said.

He didn’t need to finish that thought. Astarion tensed, between his knees, his hand still stroking Sekh’s hair. “ Darling ,” he warned.

“I’m not saying I can feed a hundred vampires ,” he clarified, “but… perhaps it would be good, to give some a taste.”

Dalyria pondered for a moment. “I do believe that once they’ve had a taste the spawn have shown more… control . You’d expect them to be rabid for it, but it truly seems to be the opposite.” She looked at Astarion. “It would be good for them.”

Astarion frowned. Deeply . “I’m not letting a horde of spawn lose on my partner to feed at their leisure. Absolutely not.”

Sekh pushed gently at Astarion, forcing him to take a step back so he could stand. “What if you were right there?” the drow asked. “I’d be safe with you present. I do think you intimidate them a bit.”

Dalyria gave a small chuckle. “He has a point, Astarion. They talk about you- the spawn that slayed the master. You’re a thing of dreams and nightmares- even to those you brought to Cazador.”

Astarion glanced between the two, before his shoulders sagged. “There’s no changing your mind?” he asked, looking to Sekh, who shook his head. “I’m not surprised. Fine . But I do not leave his side, only a few - and they get a taste . Nothing more.”

*

Sekh found himself settled into a comfortable chair, in a small but comfortable bedroom Dalyria had given he and Astarion for the night. He would have been happy to do this anywhere , but Astarion wanted a space he could control- and seemed keen that he get Sekh was comfortable as possible.

Dalyria had limited it to only four spawn- which felt like nothing compared to the sheer number that resided in the structure, but Sekh didn’t push. Anymore and he was sure Astarion would riot until the whole thing was called off.

He’d partially stripped- his shirt gone, so it would be easy to bandage his arms, after. He’d let his hair down, and felt quite relaxed , despite knowing he was about to lose a significant amount of blood. He’d sleep it off, he was sure.

There was a knock at the door, before Dalyria opened it, leading in the four spawn. Sekh didn’t recognize most of them- a tiefling woman, two elves, male and female-

And Sebastian .

Sekh felt Astarion tense when he saw the other spawn, the hand on Sekh’s shoulder from where he stood behind the chair tightening. Dalyria had no idea, Sekh was sure, that Astarion remembered the spawn- that he had left any sort of impression on the elf.

“They’ll listen to you,” she said as she drew close, looking at Astarion and then Sekh. The spawn stayed near the door, almost awkward , unsure what to do with themselves. “If you say stop , they stop. And if they don’t, they are well aware that Astarion will tear their throats out.”

Sekh nodded, and Dalyria stepped backwards once, before turning to the spawn. She spoke to them softly, before leaving the room.

Sekh watched as they walked over to him, two per side, per arm . Astarion hadn’t initially wanted them to even bite Sekh- he’d wanted to open his flesh himself, but had relented when Sekh pointed out he’d just end up losing more blood, that way.

He felt chilled fingers on his arms, and tipped his head back, looking up at Astarion- flashing him a little smile. It was alright .

The first bite came from the tiefling woman- not as deep as Dalyria had bitten or Astarion did, but enough to break the skin. The two elves bit his other arm at the same time- one at his wrist, one higher up, close to the crease of his elbow, mirroring where the tiefling woman was.

And the last bite came to his other wrist, just above Dalyria’s bite- Sebastian . The room dissolved into nothing but the wet sounds of mouths, the pain fading far quicker than Sekh was used to into a sort of cold numbness. He felt hands tightening on his arms, each spawn getting their first taste- and then their tongues pushing at the wounds, drawing out more, each feeling eager .

Astarion stroked Sekh’s hair, eyes darting between each spawn, calculating how much they could drink within the few seconds since the bites.

Sekh’s eyelids fluttered, his mind feeling sluggish . He recognized the feeling, from the first night he’d ever let Astarion feed from him- as the vampire had drained him precariously close to oblivion-

Yet, he’d stopped . And Sekh had trusted him ever since.

He let his eyes shut completely, head relaxing back. Astarion’s subtle touch was comforting, left him feeling unalarmed that he was growing subtly faint.

“Enough,” Astarion growled, his voice rumbling. All four spawn pulled back, and Sekh felt cool air resting against the open wounds- making him almost shiver.

He hadn’t even opened his eyes yet, when he felt a set of hands suddenly tighten on his arm- and then another bite, just below where the male elf had first bitten. He gritted his teeth- opened his eyes as he felt Astarion’s touch leave him, and suddenly he had the other elf held up by his neck , pressed tight to the wall.

Astarion bared his fangs, eyes a threatening glow, as the other spawn cowered under his hold. “I said enough ,” he gritted, “not take another bite . Didn’t Dal warn you? Didn’t she tell you what would happen if you didn’t listen ?”

The man tried to nod, but Astarion only squeezed his throat tighter. Sekh pushed himself forward, stood up- and oh , the room spun a little. Maybe he had miscalculated his own tolerance.

Still, he stood firm. “Astarion, you’ve scared him enough.”

Astarion glanced back at him, but relented, letting go of the vampire’s throat so he could drop to his feet. He took a step back, and the other spawn was quick to move to the other end of the room, looking terrified and ready to bolt.

Sekh had to admit, he rather liked that Astarion could put the fear of something into other vampires.

“Go,” Astarion said, staying a few paces away from Sekh. On the command the other spawn left Sekh’s sides- except Sebastian, who was looking at Astarion, watching .

When the other three had left, Astarion walked back over, placing a hand on the small of Sekh’s back, keeping him steady. Sekh hadn’t realized he’d been rocking ever so slightly.

For a long moment, there was silence , as the two simply looked at each other. Then, in a voice that couldn’t have been further from the growl Astarion had used moments before, the elf said so softly it was nearly lost in the air, “I’m sorry.”

There was a single moment of nothing , and then Sebastian reached out, past Sekh, brushed his fingers along Astarion’s shoulder. It was the smallest touch, nothing but a moment of contact- but Sekh swore he felt Astarion’s hand shake, on the small of his back.

“You’re forgiven.” It was all Sebastian said, before taking his hand back, offering Sekh a faint smile, and taking his leave. There was nothing but silence, in the room, once the door shut.

Sekh turned, but as he did so Astarion scooped him up, cradling him up to his chest. Sekh didn’t argue- his legs had felt a little weak.

Wordlessly, Astarion carried him over to the bed, settling him gently on it, so he was propped up against the pillows. He sat down on the edge of the bed himself, silently wrapping Sekh’s bite marks to ensure they stopped bleeding.

Sekh watched, as Astarion touched so gently, but his eyes were far away. When he finished one arm, reached for the other, Sekh lifted his arm, stopping him. Instead he took Astarion’s hand, laced their fingers together, gave it a soft squeeze. “Starshine,” he whispered, and Astarion’s eyes focused on him, suddenly back .

And, in a quivering voice, one that was meek , he whispered, “he forgives me.”

Sekh pulled Astarion against him, the vampire leaning down into his chest, face pressed to warm, bare skin. He trembled and Sekh rubbed his back, heard a small, broken sob. But instead of hushing Astarion, he simply let him break. He was safe , here- he could break into a thousand pieces if it would help him.

And Sekh thought it might. After all, if Sebastian could forgive him, maybe Astarion could see he was free to forgive himself.

*

They left at what felt like late morning, in the endless day-night cycle of the Underdark. Sekh almost thought Astarion wanted to stay longer - he seemed warmer towards the other spawn, when they had both risen.

Still, they had not planned for this first foray into the Underdark to last long. The rest of their party expected them back that day, and they would leave for the entrance tomorrow. This was meant as nothing more than a quick exploratory visit, to see what lay around their newly found entrance to the Underdark.

They moved slower than they had, on their way to the keep. Sekh still felt a bit weak, as much as he hated to admit it.

He thought perhaps it was his mind, in its recovering, bloodless state, that made something feel off , as they neared their camp. It was… quiet. And there was a faint burning smell to the air.

Astarion paused, a hand grasping Sekh’s arm, keeping him from moving as he listened , took in the world around them. “Something isn’t right,” he said, voice almost grave .

Astarion let go of Sekh’s arm, and then he was running , far quicker than Sekh could move. Within an instance he was simply gone , pulling on the vampiric speed he was learning so well to use- even more so than his newly discovered strength.

Sekh tore off after him, boots digging into the soft, warm Underdark dirt. He dodged around the zurkhwood trees, leapt over a large fallen mushroom- as the camp came into view-

It was a mess. Debris everywhere, more of the flora having been blown from its places within the earth- much of it smoldering .

Sekh’s heart pounded, his chest going achingly tight as he frantically searched for a sign of anyone . He was ready to start screaming for Yenna, when he could just see movement, well beyond the smoldering remains of their tent.

He ran for it, bursting through the brush, found Astarion on his knees, holding Yenna tightly to him. His grip seemed so tight Sekh almost wondered how the child could breathe- but she didn’t seem to even notice. She was clutching at him desperately.

Standing behind her, every muscle in his body tense , Rolan had a flickering flame hovering in his hand, ready to let it loose. Sekh could only imagine he’d nearly scorched Astarion before he realized it was him.

“What happened?” he asked, through panted breaths. He crouched down by Yenna and Astarion, took the girl’s face in his hands, searching for injury. She had a small cut on her cheek, and there was dirt smeared on her hands, caked on her boots- but she seemed unharmed, simply rattled .

Astarion stood up, lifting Yenna with him. She locked her legs around his waist as he rubbed her back, hushing her.

“Drow,” Rolan said, finally relinquishing his flame. Sekh could see a few tears in his clothes- he wasn’t even wearing his robes. “They came while we were sleeping still, this morning.”

Sekh moved up to him, took his hands, lifting them to examine them. They looked raw, from the sheer amount of burning magic he had used. That explained the burning smell. “Are you alright?”

Rolan nodded. Sekh could see a few cuts, places where bruises would grow- but nothing serious . “I will be,” he said. “I grabbed Yenna as soon as I awoke,” he paused, looking at the girl, “I dare say she did some damage herself to them. She’s quite a shot with that crossbow.”

Astarion leaned his head on hers, turning his attention to Rolan. “Thank you,” he said, voice thick, sticking in his throat, “for keeping her safe.”

Rolan only nodded. Sekh had a feeling Yenna had done plenty to keep herself safe as well.

“Where is Omeluum? Blurg?” Sekh glanced around, and Rolan only nodded further into the twisting, intergrowing masses of flora.

“Omeluum is in there. We managed to wound one enough to capture. But…” Rolan paused, a shuddering breath leaving him. “The rest, they- they took Blurg.”

Sekh snapped his eyes to Astarion at that, their gazes locking. Reluctantly, Astarion placed Yenna on her feet, ushering her towards Rolan. “Stay with Rolan,” he said, and she only nodded. She wasn’t crying, Sekh noticed- her eyes were fear addled, but they were angry as well.

Sekh moved into the brush, parting plants, ducking as needed- found Omeluum paces further into the overgrowth. It was pacing around a male drow, who was on his knees, thighs tied tightly together, arms secured behind his back. There was an arrow, sticking out of his shoulder- one of Yenna’s , and plenty of his armor was smoldered.

The drow perked up upon seeing him- but the look quickly faded when Sekh addressed Omeluum, and not the other drow. “Rolan told us about Blurg.”

Omeluum paused its pacing, eyes turning to Sekh from where the mindflayer stood, behind the drow. For the first time since meeting it, Sekh felt a spark of fear in his spine, staring into Omeluum’s eyes.

He had never seen him mad- but at that moment, he was royally pissed .

Sekh turned his attention back to the drow, walking over and crouching down in front of him. Behind him, Astarion hovered a few paces back.

“You took a friend of mine,” Sekh said, tilting his head slightly, ensuring his hair fell away from his face, so the drow could see the shadows as they wisped along his face. “Tell me where.”

“How far have you fallen, brother , to befriend such lowly beasts!” The drow bared his teeth. Two were missing, the blood still thick on his lips. Sekh wasn’t sure who had delivered that hit. “Things that should be nothing but slaves .”

He spoke in Common, but his words were clipped, a bit broken. Not well practiced.

Sekh chuckled, before he growled, pulled his fist back, and punched the man directly in his face. The force was enough to have the drow tipping backwards, until he fell onto his back, arms pinned painfully beneath him. Sekh stood, only the plant a foot firmly on his chest, stare down at him.

“I’ll ask you one more time ,” he hissed, “Where did you take him?”

“Lolth damn you,” he spat, “may the spider queen drink your guts like the finest wine!”

Sekh took a single, steadying breath, before he held out one of his hands, towards Astarion. He kept his eyes trained on the drow as he said, “My love, one of your daggers.”

He heard Astarion’s near silent footsteps as he approached, felt the hilt as it was pressed against his palm. “Sekh,” the vampire said, almost cautiously, but Sekh didn’t turn to look at him.

Instead he dropped to his knees, straddling the other drow’s chest, reaching a hand into his matted white hair and craning his neck back. “This,” he said, as he took the tip of the dagger, dragged it delicately along where the drow’s ear connected to his skull, “is going to hurt you far more than it will hurt me.”

The drow screamed as Sekh dug the blade in, sloppily severing cartilage from flesh. It took a few hard movements of his wrist, before the ear severed fully, falling to the dirt as blood riveted and drooled from the wound on the drow’s head.

The drow was panting in pain, and Sekh leaned back, letting his weight rest more on the man’s chest. “Where is he?”

The drow pinched his lips shut. Baring his teeth, Sekh grasped the arrow in the man’s shoulder with his free hand, twisting it. The drow shouted, tears beginning to mix with the blood staining his neck.

“Where is he!” A shout now, Sekh’s voice booming from his chest, seeming to rattle the very air around him. The drow tried to sob out a word, but nothing came.

Sekh reached blindly behind him, stabbed the knife into whatever flesh he found first. It bit past the drow’s light armor, into his belly- not deep enough to be fatal, but oh stomach wounds did hurt so much.

He twisted the blade, watching the man beneath him writhe in pain. In his mind he saw Yenna terrified, he saw Rolan burning himself raw- he saw Blurg, the gentlest soul, being dragged off like f*cking cattle .

He saw red, red, red.

He stabbed again, deeper now, twisting the knife. When he pulled it free, hovered it lower , at the drow’s pelvis, the man screamed at him.

“Lolth’s Cradle!” he yelled, and Sekh stilled his hand. The drow’s eyes were wide, pupils nothing but the smallest pin pricks. “We- we came out of there. Trading city- get a good price for slaves there.”

Sekh pulled his arm back, kept the dagger in view of the drow as he motioned Astarion over. “The map, darling,” he said, and Astarion freed the small map they’d used to reach Dalyria. Sekh pointed to a small, new marking with the dagger. “Is that it?”

The drow nodded rapidly. Sekh turned his attention fully back to him, as the drow stuttered out, “now- let m-me go . I told you, brother . You can get your slave back.”

Sekh clicked his tongue, before he stood up, taking a step backwards to free himself from the drow’s body. “My slave?” Sekh asked, inclining his head. “Oh no , brother. No. You’ve taken my family .” Sekh gripped the dagger tighter, before he slammed it down, into the drow’s thigh, gripping it with both hands and dragging it down the meat and muscle. The air reeked of blood as the wound welled with it, spilling over armor, into the dirt. The drow was sobbing. “And not only that,” Sekh mused, thinking his screams sounded lovely , intoxicating. “But to invoke the spider whor*? How shameless, how weak . Trust me, Lolth has no love for you or any drow- she’s poisoned you .”

Sekh stepped back then, left the dagger in the man’s leg. He gestured to Astarion, then to Omeluum.

“Don’t let him go to waste,” he said, watching the realization of what he was offering both of them dawn in Astarion’s eyes. “Do feed on the poor, unfortunate soul.”

The drow screamed so loud his throat was raw, as Omeluum descended first. Sekh had never seen the mindflayer feed- he knew it was working hard on trying to mimic the sustenance it got from cerebral fluids and matter- but it hadn’t yet been successful. Sekh knew it had to feed, somehow.

The drow’s screams cut off abruptly, when Omeluum’s tentacles encircled his head, pulled his skull up into its waiting jaws. Sekh heard the crunch of bone as the man’s skull gave, and then his body was limp, as Omeluum drained him.

Astarion hesitated, having moved up to Sekh’s side. “ Sekh’met ,” he said, voice hushed. Sekh turned, still feeling a rage burning in him-

Astarion looked concerned .

“I’m impressed and a little terrified of you right now,” Astarion offered. He took Sekh’s hand that had held the dagger, didn’t care that it was smearing blood onto his hand. “Calm yourself.”

Sekh took a steadying breath, willing the anger to heel. It was hard, he wanted to give into it so easily , wanted to tear at the now corpse, rip his flesh from bone, rend him nothing but pieces -

But it wouldn’t do any good. He was dead now, and Sekh had what he needed. He knew where Blurg was being taken.

When his shoulders relaxed, Astarion freed his hand, moving towards the freshly dead drow. Omeluum had stepped back, blood trickling along its tentacles. Astarion avoided the man’s neck and ruined head, and instead pulled at the armor and clothes along his arm until it was bare, and he could sink his fangs in, deep as they would go.

Sekh left him to feed, moving back through the flora, found Rolan and Yenna exactly where he had left them. From the look of concern on Rolan’s face, they could hear the screams far too well.

“You’re going to the surface,” Sekh said, “ right now . Don’t stop until you reach the entrance, until you’re safely in Baldur’s Gate, locked up in Sorcerous Sundries. Do I make myself clear?”

“We can’t leave Blurg!” Yenna yelled then. “I shot that drow, and I can shoot plenty more.”

Rolan placed a hand on Yenna’s shoulder, squeezing gently. His eyes never left Sekh. “Sekh, you can’t go alone . That’s suicide.”

“I can’t just walk into a drow city with a human child and a tiefling . You’re both at risk- I can blend in.” Sekh swallowed. “I might have left this world behind, but these are still my people. I can still blend in.”

“He wouldn’t be alone.” Sekh glanced behind him, watched as Astarion and Omeluum emerged from the growth- both well bloodied along their mouths. Astarion didn’t need to say more- Sekh knew the vampire had no intention of heading back to the city without him.

“I would assist as well,” Omeluum said, its voice sounding… different. There was a rawness to it.

Sekh knew Omeluum could disguise himself with ease- he’d done it in the city when he left the Lodge. But that was rare , and he would need to keep his concentration tight for quite some time.And even if illithid were not unheard of in the Underdark, they still left most drow feeling uneasy.

“No,” Sekh said, shaking his head. “You go back with Rolan and Yenna. Astarion and I will find Blurg.” He turned away from Yenna and Rolan, took the few steps to Omeluum, took its large hands in his own. “We’ll bring him home, Omeluum. I swear it, on everything I am.”